Anxious thoughts ruining my life and relationship
I keep having constant anxious thoughts about my relationship with my boyfriend whose parents seem to be in love with each other but live apart for work/taking care of their parent. Further, Im not really sure if we have socioeconomic parity between us. I'm rooting for my boyfriend to be his best version and in fact have dedicated all my energy into his betterment, completely ignoring mine, although he never asked me to and is a wonderful man with a promise of a successful future. His mother does talk to me seldom but seems to not care much about my life, though my boyfriend says she does and teh reason is him updating her on my life when he goes back home to her. I love this man, but I have a lot of anxiety that's recurring. Please advice me on this, preferably without asking me to break up with him.
@exuberantApple4373 It sounds like you’re feeling a lot of pressure and uncertainty right now, and that’s completely valid. Relationships can bring up complex emotions, especially when family dynamics and future concerns are involved.
First, it’s wonderful that you’re so supportive of your boyfriend, but it’s equally important to care for yourself in the process. Dedication is beautiful, but it shouldn’t come at the cost of your own well-being or personal growth. Remember, a healthy relationship thrives when both partners are growing individually while supporting each other.
As for the socioeconomic concerns, these differences can be challenging, but they’re not insurmountable. What matters most is how both of you handle them as a team open communication, mutual respect, and shared goals are key. It might help to gently share your feelings with your boyfriend, focusing on your emotions rather than any perceived gaps. For example, “Sometimes I feel anxious about where we both stand in life, and I’d love to hear your thoughts on how we can work through this together.”
When it comes to his mom, her behavior might not be a reflection of her feelings toward you but more about her personality or priorities. Since your boyfriend is updating her about you, it shows he values you in her eyes, which is reassuring. Building that bond with her may take time, but focusing on small, meaningful interactions could help ease some of your worries.
Lastly, for your recurring anxiety, consider taking small steps to prioritize your mental health. Journaling, mindfulness practices, or even talking to a therapist can be incredibly grounding. You’re allowed to love deeply while also making space to nurture yourself.
You’ve got this, and it’s clear how much you care for him. Just don’t forget to care for yourself too you also deserve it.
