Drug dependency/addicted

i think what makes quitting so hard for me is im completely alone and im not doing it for me or for anyone else, im doing it because i dont have a choice and i’ll get sent to inpatient treatment which is traumatic. ive let myself sink so far into my addiction that ive come to terms with the consequences and im okay with it, comfortable if i may. i dont care about anything/anyone as long as i have my “buddy” and i know thats bad but again, im okay with it. this might be the loneliest, stressful n frustrating situation ive to face, tbh im scared, like im extremely terrified. , 💢I apologize for this rant💢 i just dont know how to react