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We can't have change without loss.

fruityPond7887 October 31st, 2022

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Grief is not exclusively associated with death. We witness that in organisations when change transpires, how people manage change resembles how they deal with grief and loss. We forfeit something whenever things change. We must accept an ending and a new beginning, and there are no absolute norms; grief is a unique experience for everyone.

Four emotional positions

1) Shock and denial phase this stage may last a few minutes, days or weeks. During this phase, the person has difficulty believing or denying reality and may be unable to react.

2) Protest phase this stage may last a few weeks or months. During this phase, the person may experience anger, incomprehension, a feeling of injustice, guilt varying degrees, and a search for a culprit and a meaning to the loss.

3) Disorganisation phase this stage may last a few weeks or months. The person may feel very sad, anxious and helpless. They may also withdraw themselves and lose interest in their usual activities.

4) Reorganisation and adaptation phase this stage can last from a few months to a few years. After that, the person is less overwhelmed by the loss and gradually regains the ability to have fun.

Resistance to acceptance

Accepting grief does not mean resigning oneself to losing what one has failed. Instead, it is to open up and welcome the emotions in me. Acknowledging your feelings (grief, hurt, fear, boredom, anger, etc.) and admitting that they are part of you as if you were in physical pain. If you were in pain, you would analyse when it happens and what you have eaten. You would listen to your body and pay attention to the physical symptoms, wouldn’t you? Grief is more abstract, but the principle is similar. Experiencing emotions related to this adaptation process (anger, sadness, boredom, etc.) allows you to internalise and gradually reorganise yourself. Part of the evolution of this process often takes place without our knowledge. If we try to bury or daze our emotions, they remain stored inside us and can cause problems in our lives, relationships, and physical health.

We all know that life is full of ups and downs. The more we accept this fact, the easier life becomes. It is simpler because instead of seeing the pitfalls and resistance, we can see the moments to learn, grow and develop. Keep in mind that organisational life is without obstacles; although the suffering is real, these events are there to allow us to continue our evolution."

*Grief can be anything from leaving a job to losing a loved one. It doesn't have to be linked to death in particular. I am someone who hates change with everything in me. When I graduated college and moved back home, I grieved. I wasn't living on my own anymore and I wasn't constantly surrounded by friends. It was an everyday change a lot of people go through, but it was still grief. I'm here to remind you that you are allowed to grieve anything anyway you need to. Change is hard and it can really suck sometimes, but it's essential to growing as a person. I always try to remember that if you are grieving, that means you were happy! Do you still with change? How do you cope when you are grieving?*

#Grief #Change #Loss

Please find the full article at Thrive Global.

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Sunisshiningandsoareyou October 31st, 2022

@fruityPond7887

So very true that change is hard in itself and there is certainly some kind of loss involved, which is valid to be grieved for. Grief is definitely not limited to losing a living being. This one phrase alone is super validating, I feel, to remind people that it is okay to feel as they do and grieve for what they seem to have lost, be it in form of opportunities, a routine, people (breakups, distance etc) and so much more.❤

Thankyou for another amazing article, and even more amazing reflection, Pond.❤ I really loved how you said "I always try to remember that if you are grieving, that means you were happy!", can think of many instances where this fits perfectly hehe. *hugs*

Certain phrases like "this too shall pass" and "keep swimming" or "keep trying your best, and the rest shall fall into place when it has to" help me cope with life, on an everyday basis lol.❤

5 replies
fruityPond7887 OP October 31st, 2022

@Sunisshiningandsoareyou Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts Sun. You're so right that grief can take any form! I also like your phrases! One I really like to rely on is "you've survived 100% of your hardest days." It keeps me hopeful when I'm feeling down. I hope you are doing well! 💛

4 replies
Sunisshiningandsoareyou November 1st, 2022

@fruityPond7887 Aye yes, that's a great one also, and I am swimming lol, thankyouu. How you been, sweet Pond?❤

3 replies
fruityPond7887 OP November 5th, 2022

@Sunisshiningandsoareyou I've been hanging in there! Work has been up and down 😂 but it keeps it interesting! Luckily, I'm off next week and going on vacation woo hoo!! ❤️ Thank you for asking!

2 replies
Sunisshiningandsoareyou November 5th, 2022

@fruityPond7887 Aw that's super understandable, hang in tight. So excited for the week off and vacay hehe. Have a great one!🤗

1 reply
fruityPond7887 OP November 12th, 2022

@Sunisshiningandsoareyou Thank you Sun! It was a really nice break from reality 💕 I hope you are doing well and had a great week!

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wildcarot October 31st, 2022

@fruityPond7887

Thank you for your article.

I have to face a break up, and i am at present feeling a lot of anger. Yes, maybe it was because I was experiencing happiness among the reasons that made me take the decision to end up this relationship.

I would like to be able to stop my emotions and especially this anger and bitterness.

Does only time will make those emotions slow down ?

Have a nice day !

1 reply
fruityPond7887 OP October 31st, 2022

@wildcarot Hi! I'm really sorry to hear about your breakup. 😕 They are always really difficult, no matter the circumstances. I think trying to keep yourself busy with whatever you enjoy can be a great way to bring happiness to yourself. Keeping active, surrounding yourself with friends and family, and enjoying some hobbies are some great ways to keep busy. Time will also help ❤️ You will be okay, I promise!

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lucy2 November 3rd, 2022

@fruityPond7887

I understand the thoughts behind this and also the fact that Grief comes in many forms however, it seems very harsh to me, it's not a question of 'accept and move forward' it's a question of time and support.

There are 7stages of grief, many not mentioned, so I'll list these here;

shock, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, testing, and acceptance.

The consequences of losing a loved one can mean poverty, loss of accommodation, unemployment and much more to many, there is so much more to grief, it definitely isn't straightforward.


Lucy2



3 replies
fruityPond7887 OP November 5th, 2022

@lucy2 No I totally understand! I tried to highlight all the different emotions that come with grief and how there is no perfect way to healing. Grief is so complex and it will be different for everyone! ❤️

2 replies
lucy2 November 5th, 2022

Absolutely right @fruityPond7887

Thank you for highlighting Grief with this article, much appreciated!


Lucy2

1 reply
fruityPond7887 OP November 12th, 2022

@lucy2 Aw of course Lucy! Thank you for taking the time to read and to share the great resource below!! 😀

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lucy2 November 3rd, 2022