What to do with anger?
Is it better to suppress anger or to embrace it? What can anger tell us?
Kindly click here and fill out this short form to add or remove your names from the taglist
UPDATED TAGLIST 4/25/2024
1st part
@00WHY00 @1Marg1 @24963534 @24Help1 @4Rainbow42 @5catsandme @8Khaleesi8 @allen99 @ArinDee @Actuallynobody017 @adaptableOcean4193 @adventurousBranch3786 @adventurousSugar1991 @affableowl5126 @affectionateCat9553 @affectionatePear7889 @agreeablestrawberries1285 @ahaller @ahds2k @ahel58 @akbj @AKmarshmallow @Aksabode @alan254 @alanapiana1970 @alleywood13 @amanda @ambitiousNectarine1482 @Amelia763 @Amelia2324 @amiablePeace77 @amiableTortoise2797 @AmiYumi @amusingcranberry1537 @AmusingJet302 @anderly @andy @Angelface50 @AnnieIsMe @aquaCake3636 @ARIBA5 @Artemis13579 @AshcloudMac @Aspace4u @Awesomesummer1628 @ayeyaeyaaaaaaaa @azureblueheron @azuladragon34 @Baby1120 @ballooningSloth @BaltimoreSpring @bamafan96 @Barltik2065 @Beanno @beautifulsoul @becausepuppies @Beck @becknit @beachyone @believing777 @berta0322 @Bestmaple2045 @bestplum1189 @betheileen @better2Bbrave @beverlianne @bigalt21 @Billyjoe9717 @bimmernizer @BirdsWhoWrite @bisketties @bklnstar @BLSD2021 @bluebell34 @BlueEyes1819 @blueOrange6725 @BlueSky0708 @Blueskye24 @Bluesky1964 @bluevelvet3 @Blugreg @bogartfan @bouncyBeach42 @BookishWendy @bouncyVoice4149 @breezyoctopus @brightChestnut3152 @BrightSugar1923 @bubblePomegranate7179 @BurdensDown @cafelatte46 @cal1860 @CaliforniaViv @calmblueocean @calmVase7032 @Cammiecat @CandyBubblegumSprinkles @carefreeheart57 @CarefulGrapes590 @carefulsailboat231 @carelady @caringone1004 @CaringPanda45 @caringPumpkin64 @CaringSharon @carscarey @casey90 @cathy @catlady @catmandu @caughtinthemiddle @Cazzy8752 @Cheerie @chickadee123 @Chro411924 @CHT @CintaBali @classylady521 @Cliffg747 @coach411 @communicativePond1728 @Communicativepenny8383 @CompassionateLand2815 @Confused7461 @convivialCake8989 @ConvivialFriend9402 @Cookiecrumbles7079 @CoriF @courageousCoconut7282 @CourageousDaisy1111 @courageousLemon182 @CourageousSpring2022 @courteousLime9432 @CreativeYard1702 @crimsonShade6782 @CtownMimi @ctw1237 @Cubby2020 @curiousbutterfly77 @currentwise @cyanBirch4288 @CyclingThroughLife @DanaMH @DancingJoy811 @dapperPond2037 @Dave94305 @debbiehun @decisivetangerine2856 @decisiveBanana1981 @DeeGold @determinedNectarine9383 @dillon8524 @DinaElwy @diofono @diplomaticoak9588 @discreetMelon5938 @discreettriangle87 @DiscretOcean7936 @doginashirt @dolphinlver @Doodles7 @duces @ecstaticlght @einarsgirl @elderfarm @Electric100 @ElizabethGiovi @EmbStitcher33 @empathicForest15 @Emptynest2020 @emotional232023 @endearingLion70 @Enthusiasticnest1089 @equinox56 @Eva66 @Every1ahome @ExDesertScapegoat @exuberantAvocado5095 @fairmindedStrawberries7429 @Faithfulapple2400 @faithlove1111 @Favor2020 @favour @fearlessSouth4632 @FlowerLily23 @FoolsSelf @forcefulFriend4768 @forcefulStrings1005 @forcefulWriter32 @forko23 @Freeskier @FriendlyAnju777 @friendly10 @friendlyCat50 @fromthetent81 @frothyMagic6772 @FusionX33 @GabbyGee @Gabriellegahnsuksah @Gale1032 @galfromaway @gardenyarn @generousBalloon786 @gentleEast4230 @gentleLand5245 @GiftedEmpath3 @goldilocks1041 @goodmelon8247 @goodYard1477 @goodStrawberries7059 @gracefulDay3692 @GrammatoBoys @Grandma1 @GrandmaLolly @Gramma2FnM @Grammy23 @Gr8ful1974 @Greenpear036 @greenSummer1236 @gregariousKiwi9594 @gregariousZebra21 @guitarman087 @Gwen1963 @GypsyRed @HaloCompany88 @hoppa12 @HealingGriz @Heather2020 @helloBike4402 @hellopusher @helloTalker8798 @honestPeach5447 @Hotaru419 @hounddog2021 @HY00 @iamroni @Iamwhoiamwhoami @icanremember @icedcoffee211109 @IHDW1982 @ihtak @impartialDrum1848 @impartialRaspberries1389 @indigolilly1500 @indigoFriend7851 @indigoMoon1246 @innerLove @introvertedextrovert2122 @intuitiveBunny8426 @intuitiveFriend1097 @Irene2552 @IWuzADuck @JackKost @jackrock @japanesegardengirl @jazzgtr @Jim @jlmouranet @jillwings7@JolivetteListens @JoniGirl @Judecat42W1370 @junem @justbecause @Justbreathingx9 @JustExisting1027 @JustMe1225 @justpassingthrough10 @K8tjee @kala @Katbtrying552 @Kathy1212 @kathy3667 @Kavajava @kcollier6517 @Kevin0291 @kickiree @kickan75 @Kimberley555 @KindblueEyes @kindCloud141 @Kira09 @kit4228 @kitty2018 @kittycat15 @klemen @koyaanisqatse8 @Kurt789 @LadySnowcat @LakeGirl819 @Lara @lateasusual @Lauren63 @LavenderDaily @lesjon @lelahni @Lifer @lightBalsam5585 @LightSoul108 @lilaj3796 @LimegreenNorth1124 @LindaWinNJ @lisamac724 @ListeningKaty @livefreely04 @LivingLovingLifeRecovery @livingwithbpdx2 @lledmonds1969 @Lolowise475 @lonea @Lonelybeth @LoneShade @lookingforpeace @LostanLonely @Lostinlove50 @love @Love2Boat65 @LovecraftianHorror @LoveResearcher @lrsmith9636 @LucianX @luv2shop
@amiablePeace77
Hi Ami! 😊❤️ Thank you for creating this forum post and this incredibly thought provoking topic! I love this one.
Is it better to suppress anger or to embrace it?
I would have to say it depends and both! There are some moments in which things will make us angry however, it could be highly inappropriate to express it given the setting in which we are in. Everyone is responsible for regulating their own emotions and doing so can be a sign of maturity.
Having said that, it's good to eventually sit and process those feelings and emotions at some point. Continually suppressing anger could have negative effects over the long term. It almost seems to me that consistently shoving those emotions down, over and over, ignoring them could result in those emotions finding a way out eventually and to our detriment.
It could lead to a suppressed immune system, becoming more at risk to catch common colds, flu, etc. It could lead to body aches and pain, headaches, poor sleep, negative outlook, being impatient with others/short tempered, psychosomatic ailments, lack of focus, memory problems, empathy fatigue, serious mental health issues, just to name a few.
In addition, those feelings of anger could seep out eventually at the wrong place and in the wrong time. One could reach their saturation point, tipping point and in the wrong setting with someone that might not have even deserved to get the brunt of all of those pent up emotions.
What can anger tell us?
I think our anger can tell us a great deal about ourselves. An interesting vantage point is that anger isn't truly an emotion at all. It's simply an outward expression of either hurt, fear or frustration and or a mixture of them. Having that mind set can enable us to really think about why it is that we "feel angry". Why did that hurt us? What are we afraid of? What is that is frustrating us about the situation?
Thinking deeply about those things can lead to self awareness. 💡 Know thyself! It can also help us to move forward and find logical ways to find resolution to the problem. Isolating the true issue at hand, rolling up ones sleeves and drilling down deep.
Next level thought...the ego. One school of thought is that part of the art of finding true happiness is "loss of the ego". The more one can shed the ego, focusing less on the self and more on others through helpful and service driven behaviors (it ain't all about me thang 😊) the happier one may become as a natural by product. Serenity now?
To "piggy back" on that, some could consider that becoming angry in some instances can be simply an "ego move". Someone insulted you? Someone said something hurtful, someone said something that isn't true? You know better. You know it's not true. We get angry because they poked or bruised our ego. Losing that ego involves nothing left to poke at! Feeling that anger lets us know that indeed, we are still a work in progress.
We can release the thoughts to the universe as well as the person that is hurting us with the idea that we all grow and understand at different rates. We can wish them well in our hearts ❤️ and know that "grasshopper have much work to do on themselves also"! 😊
Ami, thank you again for such an amazing forum post! I enjoyed spending time here today!
*high fives* 😊 and *hugs* ❤️
@SparkyGizmo what an amazing reply - thank you for sharing your wisdom.
There is a way to avoid expressing that anger by not producing it in the first place. One thing I do is if someone criticizes me, I think to myself they are probably right and I do not see it. So what of it. I am not perfect. I never claimed to be. Then I say.
"You are right, I agree with you."
Talk about an argument stopper!
If what they say is untrue then I think to myself they are saying to me I have horns. What of it. They see something that is not there. Then I say
"You may be right but let's not get into that. None of us is perfect."
This is what I call not taking the bait when someone says something that irritates me. I try not to let it develop into anger. When I have confidence in who I am, what others say about me does not matter!
@soulsings
Wooo hooooo! 😊❤️ Might I say, this is a wonderful, teachable moment for us all from you and yet another example of why I gave you the nickname "Smooth Soul" 😊 (smooth like butter, all the way!) Noice! ❤️
I love how you are able to diffuse the situation. I enjoy hearing your thought process as well as how you put a plan into action, not taking the bait. Many of us would do well to learn from what it is that you have said! 💡
There are others in life that will "bait and goad" us. Their true intentions are in fact to anger us. This is the ultimate goal. Seeing someone become angry provides to them the ultimate "pay off". This gives them fuel, supply, a feeling of power, a sense of control over their environment and sense of control over others as internally, they have no self control or true sense of self.
They are weak and brittle little people on the inside, but lack self awareness and have no idea. Their fragile ego and hiding from themselves as well as trying to hide it all from the rest of the world is how the bullying, instigating, false bravado helps them to not face themselves day after day, night after night. No need to wish ill will on these types of folks. These are the perpetually miserable. They will be their own undoing.
I love how you mentioned how you have confidence! You have true confidence in who you are and what you are and this to me is an example of "true power comes from within". True power and strength is not bullying, not abusing and being able to rise above the behaviors of those that do. It's a powerful moment to refuse to "equalize" with these types. They will be angry either way. It's best to let them walk away, angry because you refused to be mean spirited in turn. They will spend the rest of the day feeling off kilter, not having those needs met, not feeling quite right and completely off balance. (I see it as a "them problem" and not a "me problem" 😊) I'd rather not positively reinforce negative behaviors.
I really must say, you are fast, smart, strong and kind. I'm confident that you know the difference between constructive feedback that we could all learn and grow from as opposed to snarky, manipulative, mean spirited behavior. Some serious wisdom there in being able to decipher the difference! 💡
Thank you Smooth Soul for "actively mentoring" us all here on this thread! Stay great my sweet friend! 😊
*high fives* 😊 and big *hugs* ❤️
@SparkyGizmo thank you for appreciating the suggestion and for your kind words. Much appreciated.
You really have got what I was trying to say, Way to go.
We need more supportive people like you on this site. Do you have any siblings ? 😄
I think if people suppess what needs to be said them others are not going to learn and accept life lessons for what they do to people. So I would say if things need saying then say them. Dont be violent with it, but be clear and challenge other peoples behavours where needed.
@An1mal
This is because people need to take responsibily for their actions and not simply have a "do what they want and get away with it badge" without consequence even though a lot think they can, its about honor and integrity which plays a large part in human nature too or at least should do, not just survival.
I'm big on keeping the peace in my surroundings and amongst others. As I've gotten older I've learned that the best way to deal with any negative emotion is to just pause till you can have a rational understanding of the situation.
@amiablePeace77
I embrace anger as a learning experience. What made me angry? how can I deal with the anger and go on afterwards. Anger to me is letting off steam for something we encounter. How one deals with anger is different than others
@amiablePeace77 we should utilize our anger in good or productive way instead of supressing it more example doing journaling, running,Learning a new hobby which takes our energy, or even trying to go for a nice visit to nature that often helps. Surpressing may only cause more harm.
