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Confused

I have been married 29 years and I have recently

become aware my wife has become a bit of binge drinker when we are with certain friends. She was not like this until I would say the last two years. I am far from being a prude but this has me feeling that she is trying to “live the life” that she didn’t have in high school. Our youngest child graduated right around the same time this started happening. She still hangs out with parents of the friends my daughter had in high school. My daughter thinks it’s strange and I think it’s like a kid that finally got to be at the popular kids table at lunch. I care for her deeply but if I differ in opinion about what she is doing she snaps or becomes passive aggressive. I also have been dealing with her living through our children which concerns me l. Advice please

1
toughTiger6481 May 24th

@straightforwardJet7078

Is it possible that your youngest graduating could trigger a life crisis .... people used to call mid- life crisis but i see it happening when something in their life reminds them time marches on regardless...of how young we feel. 

perhaps she does not want to feel older and having a child still in school can make some feel younger as parents these days can vary greatly depending on when you had your kids.... I do not think you can reach her unless you have empathy of what she is going through.... there also can be a menopause factor that can cause various mood swings and such.      if the drinking is becoming a problem maybe she needs someone to talk to that can understand her feelings about where is her life now that her kids are reaching that point of empty nest also .... 

Rationally we know it is coming but we think we have more time until whatever the item is that triggers and reminds us time is moving faster then we want and what is our role as mom of kids in school and younger is much different then... mom to adults.