Wife fell out of love?
Hello all. So over the past year I’ve noticed by wife of 11 years has become more distant. About 5 months ago she broke down and told me she wanted a break. I agreed but also told her I wanted to work things out. We ended up trying to patch things up but things just feel different.
We have sex less and less now, I can’t remember a compliment from her in the last year, and recently she told me that now that we’re in our 30’s, she thinks she’s better looking than me(and she’s right).
I honestly just yearn for her love. I’ve asked her about these issues before but she just says she loves me. I want to talk to her about how all this is making me feel but I don’t want to come off as needy, she gets turned off by that.
I feel that her departure is imminent or she’s just forcing herself to stay with me because of our 2 kids. How can I talk to her about this without sounding weak? I don’t want to push her away more.
@stillhere928
This might sound counter productive, but get out and enjoy yourself without her. Show her you don't need her, enjoy time with the kids but by yourself. If she says she looks better than you, just say it won't last very long, biology is cruel to women. If she's looking for a break she's looking for someone else or has found them and is testing them out. This is just the way the world is in my experience. Don't talk to her about it until she wants to talk, but then make her wait some time like she is doing to you, after all you are having fun doing other things.
@stillhere928
You don't mention whether you tried marriage counseling or not. I think it's pretty clear your relationship has gone past the point of trying to patch things up on your own. The fact that she wanted a break and has turned cool towards you are huge red flags - it looks like she has a strong desire to want out. I very highly suggest you seek professional marriage counseling before it is too late, if you have not already done so. If you have done so and it didn't work, I think you should read the message on the wall and start to prepare yourself to move on.
Hi. Honestly I’m in the same boat however I am the wife and my husband is very cold and distant. We went through and emotional affair on his part a little over a year ago and our relationship has progressively gotten worse. I practically beg him to just work on our relationship and he refuses. So I am envious of the fact that your wife has a partner willing to talk things out. She’s lucky. Hang in there. I pray it gets better for you
Best thing you can do is focusing on your well-being. Explore what makes you feel joy and then focus on your relationship. 5 min of compliments towards yourself and your partner every day can make a difference. A bigger difference would make getting in touch with a counselor or therapist because you know, when we invest we pay much more attention. Highest thoughts 🌹