Very much alone and heading for a divorce
We have been having fights for 7-8 years in our marriage. She has a very strict sense of what is right and wrong almost in a binary way. The recent issue which occured 2 weeks ago was because she found out that I have been sharing my marriage problems with an ex colleague who is a lady. I honestly didn't think that was wrong but she took it really serious.
She was ready to walk out of the marriage and during one of the weekend she told our son to either follow him of me. We were both lost because she just suddenly walked out
This week we are back at her hometown for Chinese new year. She allowed me to go quite last minute. So much so that I was still doing my wash and packing at night to make sure I have enough clothes for me and my son
She came out at night and told me she may let me go this time but she will let her family know there is nothing between us. She will also file for divorce when we are back. She also pointed out the differences between us like how I like to go to my parents and her parents when I needed help...while she doesn't like to share her problems with others.
I did try to talk her out but she is like in her binary mindset... determined.
I am going through therapy...
And I am seeing two therapist
Would always like some kind support...
Binary mindset - like black and white thinking? I hear you. She sounds selfish and uncaring, like she wants to put you down or punish you to feel better about herself. Probably doesn't matter what you say, sounds like she's not even open to hearing it. That's a terrible way to be when a child is involved. Take care of yourself and your son.
@notyethuman Wow, this sounds devastating for you and your son. Your lives have literally been turned upside-down! I am glad to hear you have 2 different therapists that you can talk with about this difficult situation. Do have any other supportive people in your life, other family members or friends? Extra help with childcare for your son?
If you'd like to chat about a hard day or any of the emotions you are going through, please reach out, either to me or another listener.
@notyethuman
I am sorry you are going through this. From reading your post all you did was talk to another woman who may of given you so compassion and help by lending a woman's perspective. I am sorry for you and your son having to go through this. Seeing a therapist is not a bad thing it can help you cope with what is going on and your feelings.
@pamharley003 Agree. I just wanted to echo what you said about counseling - that there is no shame or guilt in using a therapist. They can listen, give you helpful tools, and help you find the best path for you.
@notyethuman
feel free to connect with me ... I would be happy to chat with you .....
