I'm in Survival Mode Everyday
I don't know how I can begin... But every day, I tend to forget about certain things I have to do for the day, end up having to take a nap during the middle of the day and stay up until nearly midnight or one in the morning. I also have a bad temper, my eating habits are horrible, and I feel like the shame my family's inflicting on me is only making my situation worse. I get anxious because I can't afford to get ready for any impending disaster that could hit the world around me, and I can get blamed for things I never did or never knew I did at any time. I think knowing that no one is there to help me get the money I need to do something that I need to do to prepare for a potentially bad future the world's headed and knowing that my government has been corrupted and lied to me for decades even before I was born has me not only depressed but hating the world around me. I constantly feel helpless and don't even want to talk to my family about what's going on because of this mess.
@Ohgun Yes…it’s a mess. I’ve been there. Someone reminded me that the state of the world is something we perceive with our senses and with the stories that live in our minds. Some history reminds us that many others stood where we stand and were equally dismayed and frightened for the state of the world. How much do you internalize it and decide that “this must be the state of the world and this must be the beginnings of the future I fear…”. But is it? Are we such good fortune tellers that we are sure what will happen in our own lives tomorrow or next week? Have you not been surprised by the rare moments when you smile or laugh? Sure they are brief moments, but pay attention to them. Live in a shorter future. For this 30 minutes or this hour. Take a break from the world. Regroup and dream, maybe even plan for a future you would like. Nothing too grand, just better than right now. If we stop pushing against a future we fear, even for just a little while, it may give us enough room to let in a future that is better.