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zealousRose5745
3 14,474
L Supporter 7
5 star rating
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Number of ratings14 Number of reviews14 Listens toOver 18 LanguagesEnglish Listener sinceJun 22, 2024 Last activein last week GenderFemale PathStep 163 People helped88 Chats195 Forum posts37 Forum upvotes53
Bio

I have lived through a lot of difficult times and still do not have all the answers, but I made it through.  I'm a mother to two young adults and a teacher.  I've been through divorce, loss, grief, anxiety, financial distress, and depression.  I have seen loved ones through addiction and have had to walk away from emotional abuse.  I am in a season now where I feel grounded and able to hold space for others.

Recent forum posts
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Character Traits
IDG 7 Cups Community Hub / by zealousRose5745
Last post
 Monday
...See more The first dimension of the Inner Development Goals contains concepts related to Being-and our relationship with ourselves.  In order for us to grow and adapt, we must first be able to identify and assess where we are right now.  We need to 'drop a pin' and check in using our own thoughts in relation to feedback from the world around us.   With this in mind, I hit the link to the VIA institute and took the survey to identify what character traits might be my greatest strengths. This, I thought, could really help me leverage my present abilities and identify some areas for growth..which it did. But, if I'm honest, I will admit that I was initially disappointed in the results.  My top two strengths were humor and appreciation or beauty and excellence.  Happily, love was included there in my top three.  I felt like humor and this appreciation of beauty and excellence both seemed like fairly fluffy, superficial traits to lead with.  Will I change the world by speaking in silly voices and win over skeptics by telling them their accessories *pop*?  I had to sit with it to consider that there were different applications to consider regarding those traits, right?  For example, I think humor is sometimes an expression of humility.  We do need to remember not to take ourselves too seriously sometimes.  Another perspective I would offer is that there can be great power in finding light (or a giggle) when we feel heavy with darkness.  Humor can, in fact, be incredibly helpful when applied with discernment. Like humor, appreciation of beauty and excellence can present more than one way.  It didn't say appreciation of "standard, physical" beauty.  Nor did the character trait read as  "excellence, as defined by rank and salary."  For me, I realized, this trait is describing the idea that helping others identify beauty and excellence in unexpected ways can open us to more connection and gratitude. What about you? What qualities do you have that contain a duality- in that they could express themselves in unexpected way? What qualities do you see in others that apply?
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More on compassion and compassion fatigue
IDG 7 Cups Community Hub / by zealousRose5745
Last post
 Monday
...See more Hi again, Just today, a member opened our conversation by asking if being a listener felt "draining." I told the member that I understood exactly what they meant and that the question is a valid one.  However, I said, one of the reasons that I am serving as a listener is because I actually don't find it draining.  I find it to be fulfilling. But my exchange, this topic, is a relatable one. I wrote an earlier post, reflecting on how we might protect and nurture the compassion in ourselves.  In the 7cups community, compassion serves as a driving force in supporting those who are in need of a safe space.  If we don't preserve and care for our compassion, the risk of compassion fatigue is a real one. Compassion fatigue is a set of feelings and behaviors that occur when we serve in a capacity where we either experience repeated exposure to secondhand trauma or we feel overwhelmed. or burnt out by the combination of our heavy workload and the feeling that we're not provided the resources to be effective. (Barrera-Algaren, et al., 2024).   We are potentially at risk of these within our community.  Though most of us are serving as volunteers, we do often hear and support others in this community through processing traumatic experiences.  More importantly, this role, like that of a social worker or other caring professions, relies on us having compassion in order to be effective.  (Barrera-Algaren, et al., 2024) Serving here at 7cups as a listener is connected to an internship I am completing as a graduate social work student.  Though I do have a number of required listening hours, my service is also not mandatory.  So I asked myself whether I might relate more to feeling "drained" if my role here were more formal?I do recognize that this is role that requires compassion, I've never felt asked to give beyond what I'm able to offer. I have not really taken advantage of the extensive support offered through the mentors and communities within the platform, but I'm aware that there are other resources if I need them. One of the most powerful characteristics of serving here is the understanding of just how many other fellow listeners like us are available to provide additional encouragement and different perspectives.  In the few months that I've been connected with 7cups, I've had other listeners post and reach out in appreciation of myself, or the greater community. But what have I missed?  How do you find that the relationships within this community might actually build our capacity for compassion rather than "draining" it (as my chat this morning questioned)? References Barrera-Algarín, E., Castro-Ibáñez, R., Vallejo-Andrada, A., & Martínez-Fernández, R. (2024). Compassion Fatigue Syndrome in Social Workers and Its relationship with Emotional Intelligence. Social Work, 69(1), 24-36. https://doi.org/10.1093/sw/swad038 [https://doi.org/10.1093/sw/swad038]
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Trust
IDG 7 Cups Community Hub / by zealousRose5745
Last post
 Monday
...See more When we allow ourselves to trust, it makes sense that we are allowing ourselves to be at least a little vulnerable on some level.  We "give" trust and sometimes, for me,  this has meant committing to a certain expectation.  But something shifted about my definition of trust expanded after studying the section of the course focused on Collaborating/Social Skills.  I'd not previously recognize how trust actually empowers us to build more in community with others.  Not trusting can lead us to refuse bigger opportunities to participate in positive change. How have you grown stronger by leaning on another person (or people)?
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The things you tell yourself
IDG 7 Cups Community Hub / by zealousRose5745
Last post
 Monday
...See more I've been thinking about how we practice self-acceptance and compassion in order to allow ourselves to remain fully present and engaged.  Lately, I've observed that I could use a little tuneup when it comes to practicing compassion toward myself. I've even scheduled times at the beginning and end of each day for some affirmations.  I know in the past, some affirmations don't quite feel authentic for me.  I've learned that when I craft or edit affirmations to speak with extra context, they feel more true for me. For example, when I am feeling ineffective at my job and lacking confidence, instead of simply, "I am worthy of being confident," I might tell myself, "I have the training, compassion, and experience to make a positive difference in the lives of others."   What affirmations have you written for yourself that have been powerful in allowing you to feel safe in your vulnerability.  
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The best listener I’ve ever had! So caring and loyal—highly recommended!
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Good listener x
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positive listener
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very attentive. fast responses.
she is a very helpful listener and I feel much better after talking to her
very good listener! non judgemental. helpful
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