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thakhalessi
84 M Embraced
PathStep 5 Compassion hearts6 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2016 Member sinceAugust 22, 2016
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Sigh.
Anxiety Support / by thakhalessi
Last post
 August 22nd, 2016
...See more The time now is 10:25 pm, eastern time (I think it's eastern), exactly three hours ago I was fine. I was happy, I was laughing at stupid stupid stuff and smiling like an idiot. Now, I feel like I'm worthless. I'm a freshman in college, I just started last Monday...going to become a Graphic Deisgner. Sounds cool right? Well heres the thing, I'm 18 and over weight because of the nedication I'm on and the disease I have. I feel like I'm useless, I feel like other people don't care if I live or die sometimes, yet I know they do. I get in crowds of people and feel like I'm withering away...I can't talk to new people in fear they'll turn away because I'm fat. It's gotten to the point where I have wanted to commit suicide, and I have to admit. I have tried before (my parents didn't know). But I'm not diagnosed...my mom has depression and my dad is bi-polar. They're diagnosed. I feel like when I tell people I'm depressed or I'm having an anxiety attack they think I'm lying to create drama. But in reality, It's hard to breathe, I feel tears welling behind my eyes and my heart beats faster, I was debating on even typing this on 7 cups because I thought, "They'll just ignore it as she's fake. She don't have anxiety or depression." Because that's what most people think. I can't afford to go have a therapist formally diagnose me. I just know I feel.,,horrible.
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