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somewhereiam142
1 273 M Embraced 2
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts16 Forum posts26 Forum upvotes31 Current upvotes31 Age GroupAdult Last activeDecember, 2021 Member sinceSeptember 3, 2021
Recent forum posts
Why do people cheat?
Relationship Stress / by somewhereiam142
Last post
 November 17th, 2021
...See more Can I get opinions on why people choose to cheat?
Over her and the love I had for her
Relationship Stress / by somewhereiam142
Last post
 November 17th, 2021
...See more She blew up on me again because the house won't up to her standards. Got into a huge argument bcuz of green freaking apples being whole and not sliced. Threatened me to get out of her house and just totally made me feel like I was nothing. Mind you....I can't make her see things she don't want to see and will not see what is done for her. I could have this house sparkly clean and everything done just like she'd want but it wouldn't be good enough. She is a person who can do everything on her own and doesn't believe in partnership, intimate relationships, or anything you commit your heart, time, communication too. She does better pleasing people she works with and friends then she does with the person she's with. I'm tired of being the person who does what those won't do for her and I'm the only one who gets looked down on. I know I've said it before about leaving and not dealing with this narcissistic control freak with no regards to any boundaries and doesn't even see she has issues of her own....I wish whatever keeps me here would just go away. I've been looking for my own place and just want to leave peacefully and no arguments or tension between the two of us. When I do get the opportunity to leave...I will never allow anyone to try and dictate my life or ever make me feel like I'm worthless. I'm over this lesson and ready to move on. I know I have trust issues with her and my emotions of feeling sad and depressed pop up when I get triggered by a memory or whatever it is that reminds me of the hurt I went through but I've learned to control my thoughts and understand them more and try my best to not let it affect the relationship. When I slip up...I try to keep it to myself but I do wear my emotions and I struggle but I would never disrespect nor call her names or ever tell her the things that she has told me especially out of anger. I'm over it.
Ready to move on
Relationship Stress / by somewhereiam142
Last post
 October 23rd, 2021
...See more I think I'm ready to leave and move on. Staying in a toxic relationship where I feel sad and unsafe emotionally and mentally is not where I want to be. I'm not happy and I'm tired of the Rollercoaster arguments. I'm very much exhausted and just tired of being around her negative energy.
I want to break up but don't know how
Relationship Stress / by somewhereiam142
Last post
 October 16th, 2021
...See more I legit want to break up with my gf. Things feel very off btwn us and I have no trust in her. I honestly feel like hiding and lying comes naturally to her. However, I'm stuck in her house and I work with her. We've been on and off now for 2 yrs bcuz I can't count the first one bcuz in her words we weren't official since she was still talking to her ex behind my back. So..anyways...Since then I haven't been able to gain that trust back bcuz she does and says things that trigger me in the worse way. I just don't feel like we are for each other and when I'm not with her... I find myself a lot happier and less stressed out and my confidence a but higher bcuz I'm not thinking of her. If I were to break up with her...she'd make it hard bcuz she would just show me the attention and appreciation that I was wanting in the relationship. I'd rather be alone; she goes back and forth tho:: EXAMPLE: She'll say something along the line of: well the good thing is I don't have to stay here and I can just walk away from her. THEN I'D SAY THIS:: Well the good thing for you is you can break up with me if you don't want to be with me instead of ignoring things that need to be said to push me to do what you can't do. So things like that happen...I wish I could write a book. This situation sucks and I wish I never put myself in it. Dating a girl for the first time has been the worse experience ever when it comes to my heart and mind.
Anxiety, No trust, & Relationship
Relationship Stress / by somewhereiam142
Last post
 September 24th, 2021
...See more It's happening right now. My thoughts of my gf cheating on me. My insecurities of the past and thinking I'm setting myself up again for another heartbreak from her. I don't know how to stop it and I just feel like she can't leave her ex alone and just respect me and let me go if she can't leave her past alone. Those are thoughts replaying in my head. I just wish I could be stronger and just let things go and understand my worth. I hate soci media...its my fault for looking and creating things in my head when I'm suppose to be healing. I hurt my own mind and heart because I forget to be mindful of myself and my life. I chose to be with her and made the decisions knowing what I'd be walking back into. I wish I ddnt feel so much and could let things just be.
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