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s0cksz
1 27,299 M Aiming High 8
do not argue with an idiot
PathStep 15 Compassion hearts2,454 Forum posts76 Forum upvotes394 Current upvotes394 Age GroupTeen Last activeSeptember, 2024 Member sinceMay 10, 2024
Bio

ʜᴇʏ! ɪ ᴡᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ ʙɪᴏ!!

!!ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴍᴇ!!
(if u wanna be put in my bio just ask <3 smile)

𝘔𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘚𝘩𝘦/𝘏𝘦𝘳 (𝘐 𝘥𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘏𝘦/𝘏𝘪m) + 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘣𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘹𝘶𝘢𝘭 

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘴0𝘤𝘬𝘴! 𝘐𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘺 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘵𝘪 𝘵𝘢𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨

𝘐'𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘧𝘧 ! ! ! 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘹𝘪𝘤 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘚𝘰𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘈𝘯𝘹𝘪𝘦𝘵𝘺 𝘋𝘪𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘈𝘋𝘏𝘋, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐𝘯𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘯𝘪𝘢!




⇩⇩⇩-------------------⇩⇩⇩
Goofy wack corner:

"Im feeling 'Stressed and Depressed' my famous quote. That’s how i feel rn."
—cyanTurtle5800

“Praying to god dnamen rn”
—seven eleven the man with the melon idk whar








Recent forum posts
eating disorder log ! ! :O
Eating Disorder Support / by s0cksz
Last post
 June 7th
...See more Just a log of my eating n stuff wahoiiiii  if u wanna know the last time I've eaten look here <3 love u all
Attack log #1 (just posting this to see what happens)
Journals & Diaries / by s0cksz
Last post
 June 10th
...See more I had a panic attack leaving English.  a guy, lets call him jake, that I've been talking to for about 4 months confessed to me about 1 month ago. I thought "he likes me so I must like him back... right?", I told him right away that I wasn't ready for a relationship and he said he was fine with that. he started calling me names and shi, giving me flowers, etc. and I felt overwhelmed. when the person you like does stuff like that for you, it should make you happy right? it only made me feel anxious and scared. sure it made me happy at the beginning, but eventually it got to the point where I was having panic attacks during class. about a week ago I told him that I didn't like him and what I think was the reason why I told him I liked him. he said he could tell. I asked if we could still be friends, and he said sure.  now that I've come to terms with the fact that he likes me a shi ton and I don't like him at all, I don't know how to act around him. whenever I see him all I think is, "he wants to hold my hand", "he wants to kiss me", or "he wanted me to be his girlfriend". the main part that scares me is how he thinks of me sexually. one time he saw me in a skirt outside of school and absolutely freaked out. its constantly stuck in my head that he thinks of me that way, so during class I always feel extremely uncomfortable. I know it isn't his fault, its normal I get that. but still.  anyways, I've successfully avoided walking with him to class/talking to him in person for the past week by leaving class earlier than him. he hasn't stopped me or anything, which thank GOD. today I failed at trying to leave class earlier than him. I walked out of the class first, he was like- 6 feet behind me maybe, (context: my school has a room called the "Safe Space" where you can come in and take a breather/talk to an adult if you're having a rough day, and its literally right across from my English room) so I speed walk to the safe space and by the time I get in there my legs are weak and my hands are shaking like crazy. I could barely breath.  welp, I wrote this right after it happened to calm down. I have to go to class now :,) woo hoo my first attack log lets gooooooo.
I feel as if I am a coward (TW[?])
Self-Harm Recovery / by s0cksz
Last post
 June 1st
...See more sometime in 10th grade I started SH, but I never cut my skin. I felt as if I was a coward, the farthest I was able to go was stabbing with pencils (no bleeding), bruising, pinching, and digging my fingernails into my neck/arms. I have Social Anxiety Disorder that developed during COVID where I developed a hatred for the way I look, so I often SH out of frustration when I see other people living their lives freely. just recently, maybe a month to two months ago, (for context: I have a small mirror in my bag that I bring everywhere) the mirror in my bag cracked and took a shard out and scratched my wrist. I just barely broke the skin and beads of blood rested on my skin. I felt relieved, and for whatever reason, the frustration and self hatred disappeared for a moment. after it healed, it left small scars (they aren't even noticeable now) and that scared me. if my mum were to ever see them she would never understand, she would kick me out of the house to go live with my father who I would never want to live with. I know that not being able to break the skin isn't a think I should feel pathetic about but I do. the farthest I can find myself going is scratching with the mirror shards, then putting hand sanitizer on it.  its not like I want to go farther than that, but I still can't help but feel pathetic, like I'm not doing enough.
I am who I am
Poetry / by s0cksz
Last post
 May 26th
...See more Life is like a poem, For poems are used to verbalize emotion Therefore my intent is not to depress, but to express. I want to be loved,  Yet I don’t feel that I deserve it. I want to ask you what you think of me, But I don’t know you and you don’t know me,  So why the *** should I care. Yet I do care,  Too much… I dream that one day I will love me for ME, And not for anybody else. I dream that I’ll have high self esteem, And not high self doubt. First I need to become familiar with vulnerability, Before I can start gaining stability I will be happy. But just not all the time, For I am human. And I am who I am for a reason.
lies of love
Poetry / by s0cksz
Last post
 May 28th
...See more I love you, But I don’t, You mean you like me? Or so you used to, Why did you lie? “Because I love you.”
friend
Pen Pals / by s0cksz
Last post
 September 3rd
...See more just looking for a friend to chat to every once in a while, doesn't have to be deep convos but can be. having social anxiety disorder can be hard so I get lonely a lot. 
Social Anxiety Disorder (S.A.D.)
Anxiety Support / by s0cksz
Last post
 August 28th
...See more I have social anxiety disorder, which is basically having a constant immense fear of judgment from others. Personally, my SAD is mainly based on how i look. example of a common thought I have: "everybody is watching me" having this thought often is a symptom of SAD, the feeling that eyes are constantly on you, judging everything about you. anyone relate to this?
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