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littlebluebird523
1,600 M Little Steps 6
PathStep 29 Compassion hearts21 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2018 Member sinceAugust 1, 2015
Recent forum posts
Coping With Guilt After Break-Up
Relationship Stress / by littlebluebird523
Last post
 October 4th, 2015
...See more Hi Everyone, Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post. I'm really struggling with things regarding my recent break-up and I'd love to hear your thoughts. My ex broke up with me two months ago. He told me he didn't love me anymore, he wasn't happy, and wanted to break up. We were long distance and had some rough spots because of lack of time and miscommunication, but I love him so deeply that I was willing to do anything to make it work. When he told me he no longer loved me, my whole world shattered and I became this different person. My insecurities roared in me. I spent the past month begging him and pleading, going through severe depressive episodes, and as hard as it is to admit, even manipulating him with self harm and suicide attempts in hopes that he would come back and save me. I became the "crazy ex-girlfriend" and I don't even know how I got there. Today he emailed me, confessing his fear and to leave him alone for good. I have and will, but now I'm so overcome with guilt and shame that I don't even know how to move on. I haven't been eating because I feel that I don't deserve to eat. I try not to smile because I feel guilty for expressing joy. After everything I've done, I don't deserve to be happy. I don't deserve anything but this pain. I don't know how to forgive myself for who I've become or even where to start. What do you think? Thank you so much
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