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life4all
7 3,264 M Seeking Light
PathStep 14 Compassion hearts115 Forum posts12 Forum upvotes28 Current upvotes28 Age GroupTeen Last activeNovember, 2024 Member sinceJune 12, 2022
Bio

Bio huh? Let me “introduce” myself to u guys

well normally im the sweetest and most kind of all

but when im angry, u see this face

and why would i come to this app when im feeling well?

so get used to this. or just dont accept it if u want. Do wtv

Recent forum posts
SELF HARM addiction
Addiction Support / by life4all
Last post
 3 days ago
...See more I need to stop. If anyone could help. and no i cant get professional help.
School + self harm + family issues + religion
General Support / by life4all
Last post
 Saturday
...See more school: in our system we have 2 years of kindergarten 6 of elementary stage 3 of preparatory 3 pf secondary then college (4 years or more). I’m in the first year of preparatory, it is a new important stage but its marks isn't as important as secondary’s. But i’ve set my mind to being from the top 10. Now i have a weird obsession over full marks, in my eyes, full mark = pass, losing even 0.25 mark(s) or more = failure im so scared of losing marks but I'm not that used to studying. I didn't care a bit about marks those past years. So this is a sudden big shift. Last years, i’ve had severe depression and anxiety attacks and panic attacks and sleeping disorders and a very bad relationship with food, my health was on the ground and i was always dizzy and tired, all day everyday. now im a month and about 3 weeks in school (first term). Im so scared all of the time. When I'm in class I'm either thinking of (this is a waste of time, i want to study so bad) or (ik ur very tired but please focus, this might come in the exam) i’ve done everything to make all the teachers love me ( i want to be on top ) and i’ve tried to take care of every small aspect not to lose marks. I did lose marks tho, yesterday i got a sharp object and continued cutting cuts in my hand, I already have scars there. I need to hide those cuts from my family and friends too. And in my religion its haram (forbidden) to do self harm. Basically i cant do this cuz of so many reasons. i might with my mom almost daily and sometimes fight with my sisters or friends. I’ve been on my last nerve and always on gaurd. I get angry so easily nowadays. I could cry over nothing. Im always scared, no terrified. last year i was able to overcome my depression and anxiety and self harm, but it was *** hard, took me 3 years to be able to overcome it alone (started 3 years ago and so took me 3 years) i gave up so many things for it and now its all coming back. i want to go to a therapist or get professional help but i cant. idk what to do. I cant talk to my friends or family about this. i came here to find help.
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