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lemonSys
1,595 M Little Steps 6
PathStep 12 Compassion hearts127 Forum posts21 Forum upvotes27 Current upvotes27 Age GroupAdult Last activeOctober, 2022 Member sinceOctober 8, 2022
Bio

I have 3 cats. 

Recent forum posts
My fav jokes
Positivity & Gratitude / by lemonSys
Last post
October 16th, 2022
...See more [ most people laugh at the stupidity of these, but hey, they laugh! ] Q1: what does a farmer say when he can’t find his tractor? Q2: what’s red and looks like a bucket? (Scroll for answers) A1: “where’s my tractor?” A2: a red bucket.
Guess I’ll say hi now
Trauma Support / by lemonSys
Last post
October 17th, 2022
...See more So hi 👋 (and thanks for being here) - [ I am part of an OSDD system so there are several parts of me, but this intro will be about the me that posts here - seems logical enough :) ] Basics: 44yrs; reside in Midwest USA; have three cats 🐱. I experienced repeated physical and sexual abuse as a kid by a family member. <—— It took me years to be able to say that sentence. I’m still struggling with all this crap. Some days are better than others. Some are even good. Most suck. I need to just get over this sh-t. Been holding me back from life for too long. But knowing this doesn’t make it so. I’ve been hospitalized more times than I can count. Mostly in my teens and 20s. Most recently was a few months ago. I am in therapy and take a few different medications. I hate meds. I want off them all. They are poison. But I take them. Because they help. <—— took me years to admit that. Took me longer to actually remain compliant with them. I self-harm. I dissociate. I struggle with trust. I’m scared of intimacy. I have nightmares regularly. At some point in my life, I learned to be able to recognize while in the dream that I am scared or unsafe and to tell myself to “wake up” in a strong voice - and as a result, I actually wake up. This became super handy when combined with skills to ground myself and calm down etc. I wish I could explain/teach how this works, but I don’t even understand it. I am a survivor <—— I have to continually say this to myself. So are all of you.
Anyone else ever…
Trauma Support / by lemonSys
Last post
October 8th, 2022
...See more Have no clue who they are for several days in a row?
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