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humorousBeach2049
284 M Embraced 2
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts18 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2023 Member sinceJuly 20, 2023
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Friendship Support / by humorousBeach2049
Last post
 July 20th, 2023
...See more Hi everyone! I would like some advice. I have always wanted friends that shared my passion, so years ago i made a twitter account to connect to people. I had few conversations but it never grew into anything, mostly cause the other person didn't seem interested i guess. Then 3 years ago I finally started talking to this girl and we became close friends till now. Since i found her, I could share my opinions on our common interest or just talk to her about anything and i found that enough, so i didn't try to tweet much anymore or find other friends (mostly cause i found difficult to make them). But she always had other people she talked to that became her friends. Then I started following this other person and they followed me back but followed also my friend's account. My friend and this other person started commenting on eo tweets and became friends. I find myself jealous of this. It's not like i want my friend to only talk to me, but i just get these ugly feelings that make me think ' she likes talking to others more than me/ i am not funny enough/ i dont have an amazing personality that make people want to talk to me and they prefer others'. I don't have these feelings 24/7 , i just get triggered sometimes. For example my friend never remembered my birthday in all three years we have been talking, but she remembered her new friend's, sent her a heartfelt message, and from what i understood she also wanted to send them a gift. I know She didn't forget on purpose, She sctually remembered a month after😂,she apologized and felt very bad , so i never got mad or anything but i did feel sad and like i'm not important enough. I feel like at the end people always prefer others to me and even if i love talking to her, this isn't matched someway? For ex to remember her birthday at the beginning i wrote it on an app that gives me notification so i wouldn't forget, or if she tells me something i try to remember as much as i can in any way and it just hurts when the other person doesn't care enough to do the same. I mean i see she also watches things with this other friend or open up about something that never told me about and i feel sad about this. I want to make sure i don't intend to control her like a possessive friend cause i'm not like that, i am happy that she has other people to talk to and feel comfortable with and i don't want this to change, that's why i've never told her any of this. Im not even sure myself what i want, probably just someone who prioritize me like i do? But this isn't her problem,but mine. I just would like to stop feeling like this. I know most of this is because of my own insecurities and low self esteem, anxiety etc so i should start working on myself. I know if i feel good about myself and have some confidence, i wouldn't feel like this, but my main problem is that i don't know how to😂 it's not that big of a deal but it's something bothering me for a while and that's why i decided to talk about it here, maybe someone could share their point of view or if they felt like this too. Thank you for reading.
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