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happychipmunk
1,483 M Little Steps 5
PathStep 57 Compassion hearts178 Forum posts37 Forum upvotes117 Current upvotes117 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2024 Member sinceJune 18, 2022
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Step 11
Gateway to Growth Paths / by happychipmunk
Last post
 December 16th, 2022
...See more Ok, my step 11 (now 14) is to get a long term listener. It has a link to a forum post. But there is no way to move past the step. If I click the button above I can do something else, but my next step is always to get a long term Listener. However here's the thing, I have a long term listener, I've posted on the forum twice and even talked with other non-long term listeners. I've up voted there post. I've done all I can to move on, but my growth step remains the same. What does this thing need me to do, I don't get it?
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Anxiety begets Anxiety
Anxiety Support / by happychipmunk
Last post
 Sunday
...See more Hello all, this is my first time posting. I honestly didn't know this place existed until I stumbled on it during a web search. That being said, I'll get right too it. I am married to a woman who has General Anxiety Disorder. I've met several people over the years that have GAD, but hers is one of the more severe cases. She regularly sees a therapist and is on medication. However, from what I've read, people with more severe cases either get clingy or they move into avoidance. In her case it is avoidance. She rarely talks with me. She doesn't love human contact and veers away from it. She doesn't want me to sleep in the same bed, or sit next to her on the couch. For the most part I have been able to cope. The real problem is that her anxiety symptoms seem a lot like someone who is emotionally disconnected, it is a red flag in the relationship, and so I just live my life with red flags blaring in my ears constantly. Recently, two of our close friends started having marital problems. I won't go into a lot of details, but my wife has been having a lot of conversations with the husband. In the end, my guess is that they will be able to fix their marriage, and my wife is truly only trying to help a friend. However, over the last two weeks, it is enough to send me over the top. I say this, because among all my other insecurities and red flags in the relationship, now I am dealing with her talking for long periods of time with another man who is having marital problems, all the while I barely get two words out of her. The other day I completely broke down, the anxiety got to me, I couldn't help it. When I looked to her for assurance and help, I got the cold shoulder, it's not her fault, my anxiety heightens her anxiety and she is barely hanging on. Anyway, my brain is whirling. I've been married to her for over 15 years, and for the first time, I think I am going to seek therapy. It's a hard pill for me to swallow, to realize I've reached this point. Being so new here I don't know what to expect, answer, don't answer, I just needed to say something, and I don't want to set her anxiety off in the process. Thanks for reading.
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