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fairmindedBalsam4236
2 1,958 M Hopeful Heart 2
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts60 Forum posts15 Forum upvotes12 Current upvotes12 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2025 Member sinceJanuary 6, 2018
Recent forum posts
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I always feel like I'm causing issues and am a burden to my friends and family.
Anxiety Support / by fairmindedBalsam4236
Last post
 26 minutes ago
...See more My friends recently have had stuff going on in there lives and havent been keeping in touch as much. When they respond if they do it's very short and dry answers. Even my family I feel like it's the same type of responses. I can't help but feel like I'm annoying them...it keeps getting worse and I just want to cry, I feel so overwhelmwd by my own thoughts. How can I work on this feeling and just be happy again?
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Social anxiety is causing me to question myself...
Anxiety Support / by fairmindedBalsam4236
Last post
 October 24th, 2024
...See more So I have issues making small talk and getting past that "awkward" stage of making friends. I love talking about deep subjects like what's out in space, how the soul works, what happens to us after death, the paranormal stuff like that really piques my interests because it's so different than the surface level as far as communication. I feel like I can't hold conversations because recently people at work have been diving head first into stupid rumors and drama. It's hard for me to talk about others so easily. I question myself because I've tried active listening and it's hard when I can't personally connect with, let's call her Janet, sleeping around the office. (Which I know her pretty well and don't believe rumors) It's just the example, like wtf would I care if so and so is doing something in their own time on their own accord. It's none of mine or anyone elses business. I wish I could connect with people but they don't seem to want to discuss anything past the surface level so I feel left out 90% of the time when I'm the room. People don't go out of their way to talk to me or ask my opinions even though I reach out outside of work all the time. I feel like I'm just....here you know? And not a person
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Why do I always feel responsible for things that aren't my fault?
Depression Support / by fairmindedBalsam4236
Last post
 September 20th, 2024
...See more Everytime in a social aspect, I feel like I'm to blame. People didn't respond- "I made them mad." Something is delayed -"I should have been faster in fixing it." I'm constantly fighting myself trying to make myself believe Im not at fault. It's like one side of me always is screaming that I'm the problem...and I'm exhausted
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Always feel alone and unloved
Depression Support / by fairmindedBalsam4236
Last post
 March 16th, 2024
...See more I've made many friends online as forums are easier for me to express myself than irl. But, it's been 5 months and I've stopped posting or talking to people. Mainly because I was always reaching out to them first to chat or hang out in a voice lobby. Now it's been dead silent since I stopped making the effort. I thought I was loved there...I guess I was wrong....just wish people gave *** about me instead of lying to my face...it's so hard for me to make friends and then they always use me and throw me away like trash
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My friends all only message me when they wanted something from me
Friendship Support / by fairmindedBalsam4236
Last post
 May 27th, 2023
...See more I hadn't spoken to one of them in over a month, first thing he asks is "can you teach me this?" And "I need your help" I'm currently working three jobs to pay for a house and when I said I don't have time, he never responded and hasn't since. Another friend asked me to help them with a program and didn't say hello first. I hadn't spoken to them in over 3 months despite me trying to check in with them regularly. A third one just today said "let's do this together" meaning they wanted me to do all of the work on a project like always....I feel so used and sad. I wish I had one damn person who actually checked in on me. Guess it's time for me drop them completely.
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I feel mentally exhausted from my friendships
General Support / by fairmindedBalsam4236
Last post
 May 11th, 2023
...See more Just recently, most of my "friends" take weeks to respond to me and I've told them it upsets me because I have trauma in the past regarding this (I was told I was annoying and cared too much by my last friend groups and also that I wasn't a fun person to talk to, point blank ...) but regardless they really haven't made an effort to respond in a timely manner since I've told them how it makes me feel. I feel like I do something wrong each time it happens and I'm mentally worn down by it. I also work three jobs to pay for bills so I'm simply wanting a conversation when I have the time but I guess it's too much to ask for...they seem to not care and im so sad 😞
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