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emotionalStormcloud52
209 M Embraced 2
PathStep 9 Compassion hearts12 Forum posts15 Forum upvotes13 Current upvotes13 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2021 Member sinceApril 7, 2021
Bio
Trans, BPD, Generalized/social anxiety, Depression, Eating Disorder?
Recent forum posts
Suffering Eternally
Anxiety Support / by emotionalStormcloud52
Last post
 May 20th, 2021
...See more I just can't do it. I want to get some medication to help with my anxiety amd depression. I'm so tired of always feeling anxious. Always feeling tense. The daily anxiety attacks. And I can't do anything about it. I've been unemployed since before Covid because working and having to be around People is just too much for me. And my depression is so bad I literally don't find anything fun. I can't make a phone call to a friend, let alone a doctor. If it weren't for my BF I wouldn't be on my sleep medication, my testosterone or anything else. Because he HAS to call and pretend to be me. I have a panic attack the whole drive to those appointments and the whole time I'm in there. But I can manage. I just refuse to bring up my chronic pain because I don't trust them to take me seriously. And I do NOT like therapists. I have an EXTREME hatred for them. Thinking about them not only makes me feel filled with rage, but also give me a full blown, face and body numb, panic attack. And that is just THINKING about talking to one. Just typing this out is already making me dizzy and nauseous. But the 2 experiences I've had with therapists in the past have been enough for me to not want to ever go again. It doesn't help that I'm extremely against getting help from others. I do not talk to even my family about my issues. They are mine and mine alone. Even when my legs scream in pain I refuse to use an aide. Because I HAVE to be okay. And I'm honestly so tired of feeling this way.
Hi...
Depression Support / by emotionalStormcloud52
Last post
 April 7th, 2021
...See more Hello, my name is Chase. I'm 25. I'm transgender. I have suffered through a lot of issues mentally for most of my life. Depression, anxiety, eating disorders...an unofficial diagnosis of BPD and questioning Autism, was diagnosed with ADD as a child and many ASD cases are misdiagnosed as that, OCD and other mental health issues. I've been pretty much helping myself on my own since childhood. I saw 1 therapist and 1 counselor in my life. And both of them gave me an extreme hatred towards mental health professionals. So...here I am.
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