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decisiveCucumber9460
715 M Little Steps
PathStep 21 Compassion hearts70 Forum posts16 Forum upvotes12 Current upvotes12 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2022 Member sinceMarch 25, 2021
Recent forum posts
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What do you eat?
Depression Support / by decisiveCucumber9460
Last post
 October 7th, 2021
...See more So while my depression is MUCH better (thanks meds), the side effects mean I am never hungry (even if I haven't eaten in 24 hours) and I have zero energy to even think of cooking. What do you all eat when things are like this? I know I need to but have no desire to and everything seems like too much work. :/
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Struggling with food
Depression Support / by decisiveCucumber9460
Last post
 August 17th, 2021
...See more I've always struggled with food and eating enough just because of how my body works. But now I'm on depression medication, I literally never have an appetite and I struggle to eat even though I am supposed to. Nothing sounds good, even old favorites. I'm lucky if I can force myself to eat even one meal a day. Has anyone else struggled with this and have any tips?
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I was ready but now I'm still here?
Depression Support / by decisiveCucumber9460
Last post
 January 22nd, 2022
...See more The other day was just.... I couldn't anymore. I've struggled with serious depression my whole life but the past 2 years or so have just been too much. In every category of life. I was feeling so overwhelmed and hurt and confused and angry and sad and just empty. It didn't seem like life was ever gonna even out the good and bad and just keep throwing my to the wolves. So I tried to think of a solution for myself and decided it was time. Time to end things. I made a plan, had a note, all the jazz and I've never felt so.... calm. Peaceful. Relieved. Grateful in my entire life. It'd finally be done. I could get off the nightmare ride. But there was one more thing to do- I'd made game night plans and made raspberry mousse which couldn't go to waste (too delicious) and owed them. So I figured I'd be a last hurrah and then I'd come home and go to sleep and have no more tomorrows. Yes. But we stayed later than I expected and I had a migraine and was too tired and in pain to go through with my plan. So I delayed it, thinking I'd have the next day even if that brought back all the weight of living. It's been a few days now. Tbh, idk why I haven't gone through with my plan. My note still sits on my desk. I've dreamed of that moment of long-awaited release since then a lot. I still want to end things. But I have trouble convincing myself now is the time. Idk why. Nothing changed. But here I stay. Telling myself "good work, sleep well. I'll most likely k*** you in the morning."
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Moving from Existing to Living
Depression Support / by decisiveCucumber9460
Last post
 July 10th, 2021
...See more Anyone know how to move from just vaguely existing to actually living? Since apparently I won't be ending things anytime soon, I'm wondering how I move from this feeling of apathy all day, every day to maybe enjoying things. But even the things I used to really enjoy I don't anymore, I just do then to distract my brain. I'm not sure why or how that happened. Any and all ideas welcomed.
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Medication Questions
Newbie Hub / by decisiveCucumber9460
Last post
 July 6th, 2021
...See more Hi all, I was wondering if there's a space to connect with others about medications (best types, uses, results, side effects, etc.)? I'm still working on creating a wholistic plan for myself and would love to hear what's worked for others but am not sure where to find that. Can you help direct me?
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