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dapperPapaya4394
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PathStep 15 Compassion hearts302 Forum posts17 Forum upvotes7 Current upvotes7 Age GroupAdult Last activeDecember, 2024 Member sinceMay 17, 2020
Recent forum posts
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SO has Retroactive Jealousy - should I tell him more truths?
Relationship Stress / by dapperPapaya4394
Last post
 December 7th, 2020
...See more Hello all. My SO has pretty bad retroactive jealousy, probably made worse by the fact that I trickle-truth told him about my past sexual experiences - at first I told him 20 people (I was drunk and hadn't counted so I guess I overspeculated..) when in fact it was 10. His reaction was so bad after a while, when I told him the actual number he wanted to know all my experiences and who and when. This then became an obsession where he felt he would calm down by knowing more details, which would then only send him into a deeper hole. I told him a while ago that he doesn't know all my sexual experiences, but he does know the ones I actually 'slept with'. He said that's okay, but I sometimes think about it and am conflicted whether or not I should share it with him. He's been doing better at the moment and I have read that knowing more, retroactive jealousy gets worse. The less they know the better. But I don't want him to find out and then feel lied to. What do I do?
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Partner throws tantrums
Relationship Stress / by dapperPapaya4394
Last post
 June 16th, 2020
...See more I feel really sad and alone right now and occasionally feel like this. For the last few months, my partner (31M) and I (25F) have been getting into the same argument over and over again. He is really upset by my sexual past and sometimes when we've had a fun night with some drinks he gets extra upset by this and we get into a bottomless fight. He wants to know why I've done this to myself. I've slept with almost literally a dozen people and four of them were boyfriends/dating. When he has had some drinks he calls me a slut and when he is overall such a loving, respectful man especially regarding women he then is the opposite. He says very vulgar things about my genitals having been stretched because of this (which is completely untrue) and that the only way this will get out of his mind is if I tell him why I did this to myself. Which I can't really explain even though I tried - having been very insecure, not having my parents or any other support when I was a young woman living by myself in a big city, trying to find love and affection, etc. ive tried everything and our fights have been getting better overall. He used to get so upset he would shout at me for hours, hit himself, punch furniture or walls. He never ever touched me nor will he ever. I have done the same thing out of utmost frustration. I have tried bearing my should to him every single time and he will listen carefully and all of a sudden switch and get mad and spiteful again.
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