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coraton
205 M Embraced 2
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts13 Forum posts5 Forum upvotes12 Current upvotes12 Age GroupAdult Last activeFebruary, 2020 Member sinceOctober 24, 2019
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Sad
Depression Support / by coraton
Last post
 January 12th, 2020
...See more 2 weekends ago my husband got a concussion at work....last weekend we found out he has a Arteriovascular fistula (artery to vien connection in his skull, not brain thank god) and then last night he had a migraine and completely altered in him mental state- personality change, complete confusion, incredibly anxious and back to the hospital we went.....hes been out of work since the beginning. He cant watch TV, look at him phone much, be in a lot of light, move around much. Im started working a new job, orientation was this week. No paychecks this week. Son decided to do a leave of absence from college becasue he needs to create a portfolio of work and hes overwhelmed. Bills are behind, car needs breaks. Im calling doctors offices, getting runaround, dealing with Workmens Comp, not qualified for FMLA, so trying ADA to save his job. And needs surgery ASAP....out of work for 1-4 months. All I do is worry and think and have no one to talk too. I tried talking to two friends and venting but they have stated Im incredibly selfish and that I HAVE TO do this or that no matter what....I have to do everything....Im exhausted, sad, scared, mad, anger, want to runaway....this is the most serious Ive ever wanted to not be me....I cant do this....my brain is nothing but negativity and darkness and I want to hide from everything inside and never come out. I cant
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Numb
Depression Support / by coraton
Last post
 April 7th, 2020
...See more Numb Heal...? Mend.........? Stop the aching so deep in my soul ....I dont know how to get rid of it.... that deep gut wrenching sadness that overtakes all happiness.... Trauma from decades ago.... ...is now self inflicted pain that never stops It needs to stop smothered.......the emotions paralyze....cant find a way out through the gut wrenching hurt.... It pulls me in....like a bedtime story I know so well.... deeper I fall, deeper I feel...the more I need to be numb.... To live to do everyday.....overwhelming overtaking...... Put it back....close it up....have to live, to survive for tomorrow Numbness takes over.....I can breathe again... Numb
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