comfortableNight4463 Listener Profile

comfortableNight4463

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Number of ratings112 Number of reviews91 Listens toTeens & Over 18 LanguagesEnglish, Sinhalese Listener sinceOct 25, 2021 Last activein last week GenderFemale PathStep 158 People helped311 Chats2,518 Group support chats1,230 Forum posts5,023 Forum upvotes5,285

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Hi! I'm Night. I am here to provide support by listening to you.

Recent forum posts

(Article) Dealing with Betrayal

Friendship Support / by comfortableNight4463

May 11th, 2023

...See more 1. Talk with someone you trust Talking about the situation with someone you can trust can be healing and help you clear your thoughts. You can turn to a close friend or loved one, but a therapist is also an option if you feel uncomfortable discussing it with people you know. 2. Practice self-care Taking care of your physical health can help you heal from betrayal. Aside from taking care of your physical health, relaxing and calming your mind can help. If you overthink while lying in bed, consider taking a bath or listening to soothing music. You can also turn to your hobbies to boost your mood. 3. Acknowledge and accept Denying the betrayal won’t help you cope, but acknowledging the situation can. Then, you can accept and clarify what occurred, helping you move forward. Acceptance allows you to feel your emotions and work through them. 4. Don’t blame yourself When healing from betrayal, you might wonder if it’s your fault. This thinking is detrimental and can interfere with healing, so consider reminding yourself whenever necessary. 5. Be patient with yourself Healing from betrayal is a process that you can’t rush. It might consume your life for a while, but you’ll feel better each day if you keep trying to overcome it. Try to give it time. 6. Give yourself space from the person that betrayed you Healing from betrayal is hard enough, but it can be even more difficult when the person who hurt you is around. Consider asking them to give you space to process and think about the situation. 7. Practice forgiveness When you forgive someone for betraying you, it doesn’t mean what they did is OK. Instead, it means you’re releasing resentment and choosing personal peace. Forgiving someone also doesn’t mean you must let them back into your life. You can forgive someone without rebuilding a relationship with them. 8. Avoid retaliation Being betrayed is incredibly hurtful, and you might want to get back at the person who hurt you. But revenge is detrimental, and you’ll likely regret it later. Read the complete article available at PsychCentral! [https://psychcentral.com/health/dealing-with-betrayal] Reflection: What are some other tips that might help in dealing with betrayal? #Friendships #Relationships #Betrayal #Coping

What to Do If You Feel Disconnected From Your Family

Family & Caregivers / by comfortableNight4463

May 12th, 2023

...See more Why do I feel no connection to my family? Disappointment from unmet expectations is typically the underlying cause of feeling no connection to family. Mental health therapist Amira R Martin, LCSW-R, explains that some of the signs of a dysfunctional family include: * poor communication or conflict avoidance * lack of support or emotional validation * enmeshment or over-involvement in each other’s lives * physical, emotional, or sexual abuse * addiction or substance abuse within the family * unhealthy dynamics, such as scapegoating or favoritism * neglect or disregard for the needs and feelings of individual family members If you feel emotional detachment from your family, you can make some changes to cope with it and reconnect. Some of the things you can do to deal with emotional detachment: Practice self-acceptance It involves accepting your feelings and not putting yourself down for the situation. Speak with a professional Attending therapy can help you get professional advice to deal with emotional detachment. A therapist can teach you coping methods that help you heal and rebuild a relationship, if you want to. Communicate regularly and openly Therapist Grace Olivia Dickman, LCSW, suggests “practicing emotional vulnerability in small doses with your family. Share your feelings, ask meaningful questions about their wellbeing, or pull in a resource you learned in therapy.” Other ways to deal with emotional detachment There are numerous ways to rebuild a healthy connection with your family. It can take time to foster a safe relationship with loved ones, but you may also consider the following tips: * gain an understanding of their values * be patient * understand their emotional needs * learn more about yourself and the world * address unresolved conflicts * ask them about their lives and interests * show them that you care * ask why it seems like they don’t support you * offer or ask for a sincere apology * spend quality time together * listen to their perspective * show appreciation for them * forgive them for past mistakes Read the complete article available at PsychCentral! [https://psychcentral.com/health/feel-no-connection-to-family#coping-with-emotional-detachment] Reflection: How is your connection to you family? #Family #Connection #Communication If you liked this article, you might also like, " [https://www.7cups.com/forum/FamilyCaregivers_191/General_2429/HowtoMaketheMostofFamilyTime_300902/]How to Make the Most of Family Time [https://www.7cups.com/forum/FamilyCaregivers_191/General_2429/HowtoMaketheMostofFamilyTime_300902/]" [https://www.7cups.com/forum/FamilyCaregivers_191/General_2429/HowtoMaketheMostofFamilyTime_300902/]

(Article) Am I in Love?: 15 Signs You Are

Relationship Stress / by comfortableNight4463

May 7th, 2023

...See more 1. You can be yourself When you first start seeing someone you’re interested in, you might hide your flaws. If you’re in love, you may not worry as much anymore and will be comfortable being yourself. 2. You’re willing to put in effort When you start wanting to peacefully resolve conflicts or resolve conflicts or co-create a happy dynamic, it’s a sign of love. 3. You’re disinterested in other people You most likely won’t want to date anyone else, and people you were once interested in don’t matter much anymore. 4. You want to learn about their interests You may not have ever wanted to try something before, but if your partner enjoys it, you’re suddenly interested. 5. You prioritize their needs Prioritizing your partner’s needs and desires indicates that you’re experiencing love. You may choose to focus on what they need on the same level you consider yourself. But it’s important that your needs are prioritized by your partner as well. 6. Your feelings get stronger When you’re in love, your feelings get deeper and stronger. 7. You’re grateful for them If you’re thankful for the little things your partner does, you might be in love. You won’t take them for granted, and their small gestures will mean so much. 8. You’re thinking of introducing them to your family It requires being comfortable enough to let them into the private areas of your life. 9. You enjoy more than their physical appearance Many people believe intense physical attraction signifies love at first sight, but long-lasting romance requires more than that. You’ll also be interested in deepening your emotional connection. Enjoying your partner’s quirks and unique qualities indicates that you’re in love. 10. Talking to them is easy When you’re with someone you love, you’ll talk about everything. Nothing will be off limits, and you’ll want to share everything about your life with them. 11. You’re proud of them Being proud of someone shows deep feelings, and you’ll likely want to brag about them. You may take pride in their accomplishments and feel good about their joy and success. 12. You have fun with them no matter what you’re doing You’re likely in love if you have fun with your partner while doing chores or grocery shopping. Doing simple things becomes enjoyable when you do it with someone you have deep feelings for. 13. You give them undivided attention Being in love often makes it hard for you to focus on anything else when they’re around. You may find it easier to engage in conversation with your partner and attune to them. 14. It’s easy to plan for the future with them When you’re in love with someone, you may desire to plan the future with them. Most likely, you won’t second-guess making long-term plans when you experience these feelings. 15. Disagreements don’t make your feelings waver All couples argue and have disagreements, and they could make you question your feelings. It could be love if your feelings don’t waver during these moments. You can maintain commitment and strong feelings even when things get hard. Read the complete article available at PsychCentral! [https://psychcentral.com/relationships/how-do-you-know-if-youre-in-love#signs-youre-in-love] Reflection: What other signs indicate that you're in love? #Relationships #Love #Signs

How To Own Less Stuff- 5 Ways

Healthy Living / by comfortableNight4463

May 11th, 2023

...See more * Take Inventory Start by taking inventory of what you have. Go through all of the rooms in your house. Declutter and sort out the things you want to keep and the things you need to get rid of. * Stop Buying Unnecessary Things Track your spending to see what your money is being spent on. Then consider your needs and wants and make a budget with these things in mind. * Understand Why When do you do the most unnecessary shopping? Late at night? When you are bored? Tired? Unhappy? Shopping can make us feel good and help us escape negative feelings. It gives us a momentary feeling of happiness when we hit that button to complete a transaction. Take a deeper look to figure out why you are buying excess things. Then work to fill that area in your life with something positive. * Borrow When Possible I am often guilty of needing something last minute and instead of asking a friend or family member, I just go ahead and buy it. This includes items I only need to use one time. Start thinking of things you can borrow for short or one time use. This could include: * Clothes for special occasions * Kitchen tools * Home improvement tools * Kid or baby items * Items for one-time activities or events * Spend Less Time On Your Phone On average, we spend over 3 hours a day on our phone. This means we are exposed to a ton of ads and emails that are urging us to buy something now. Read the complete article available at Thrive Global! [https://community.thriveglobal.com/how-to-own-less-stuff-5-ways/] Reflection: What are some other ways to reduce unnecessary spending? #Money #Shopping #MentalHealth If you liked this article, you might also like, " [https://www.7cups.com/forum/CommunityProjectsEvents_184/ArticlesandQuotes_2369/WhyWeOftenOverspendWhileTreatingOurselves_283476/]Why We Often Overspend While Treating Ourselves [https://www.7cups.com/forum/CommunityProjectsEvents_184/ArticlesandQuotes_2369/WhyWeOftenOverspendWhileTreatingOurselves_283476/]" [https://www.7cups.com/forum/CommunityProjectsEvents_184/ArticlesandQuotes_2369/WhyWeOftenOverspendWhileTreatingOurselves_283476/]

New Study Finds How Long It Really Takes To Establish A Gym Habit

Motivation & Accountability / by comfortableNight4463

May 11th, 2023

...See more A recent study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, a peer-reviewed journal, discovered the amount of time it may take to establish a gym habit is probably longer than you’d like ― around six months, according to the research. To create a fitness habit, do a workout that fits in with your life and interests. Just because some people can commit to a gym habit in six months doesn’t mean the same will happen for you — it could take you a longer amount of time or a shorter amount of time. Think about what can realistically and conveniently fit into your life and work to incorporate that gym-going experience or, potentially, at-home workout regimen into your life. So, if you don’t like taking public transit, opt for a gym within walking distance of your home instead of a subway ride away. Put your workouts on your calendar. She recommends looking at your calendar on a Sunday and marking down when you can go to the gym that week. And don’t feel discouraged if it takes a few tries to establish your gym habit. “Don’t think that forming a habit will be a quick process. It is important to recognize from the beginning that developing a habit is something that will take time, especially for exercise,” Maher said. “So much of our daily lives is rooted [in] conscious deliberation and reflection. If we can make the act of going to the gym or exercising more automatic, it can reduce many of the cognitive barriers that can prevent us from enacting those behaviors in the first place,”. Read the complete article available at Huffington Post! [https://www.huffpost.com/entry/gym-fitness-habit_l_644be051e4b03c1b88ccf6ab] Reflection: What are your thoughts on this article? #Exercise #Habits #Motivation

(Article) What Type of Person is the Best Match for Empaths?

Relationship Stress / by comfortableNight4463

May 11th, 2023

...See more Type #1. The Intellectual: Intense Thinker Intellectuals can make good partners for certain empaths because their sense of logic compliments and grounds an empath’s emotional intensity. Tips to Help an Empath Communicate with an Intellectual * Ask for help. Intellectuals love to solve problems. Be very specific about ways they can assist you with a problem or task. * Mention only one issue at a time. Intellectuals can get thrown off by too many “unfixable” emotions. * Regularly communicate. Keeping the lines of communication open with intellectuals allows you to be clearer and more loving with each other. Type #2. The Empath: Emotional Sponge Empaths are kind, supportive, and passionate partners. They also tend to feel their own and their spouse’s emotions to an extreme. I am often asked, “Can two empaths have a good relationship?” Yes, definitely. The heart connection is incredible! Because both partners understand each other, they don’t have to explain themselves as much. Tips to Help Two Empaths Communicate * Take time apart each day to relax. Calming minibreaks by yourself are restorative. Go for a walk outside or meditate in your room alone. Exhale pent-up emotions such as anxiety or fear so they don’t stay in your body or you project them to your partner. * Protect your sensitivities. Make a list of your top five most emotionally triggering situations. Then, together, formulate a plan for handling them so you don’t get caught in a panic. * Meditate together. This helps you to connect spiritually in silence and will strengthen your bond. Type #3. The Rock: Strong and Silent Type Consistent, dependable, and stable, they will always be there for you. You can express emotions freely around them. They won’t get alarmed or be critical. You can always count on them, which is reassuring for empaths who love consistency. Empaths and Rocks can make wonderful partners. They balance each other. Rocks can learn from empaths how to express their passion and emotions more clearly, while empaths can learn grounding from the Rock. Tips to Help an Empath Communicate with a Rock * Express gratitude. Regularly voice appreciation for a Rock’s positive qualities. * Make an intimacy request. In order to connect more deeply, ask the Rock to express at least one emotion a day such as “I’m delighted,” “I love you,” or I’m feeling anxious.” * Spend time in nature together. This will let you have a mutual physical activity which will bring you closer to each other in natural settings. Read the complete article available at Thrive Global! [https://community.thriveglobal.com/what-type-of-person-is-the-best-match-for-empaths/] Reflection: Who is your ideal person? #Relationships #Empaths #Compatibility

10 Common Mind Traps We Fall Into When We’re Feeling Stressed

Work & Career / by comfortableNight4463

May 7th, 2023

...See more * All-or-nothing thinking: You categorize life into the extremes of black and white and blind yourself to the shades of gray, where truth lies. Takeaway: Listen for yourself using words like always, all, everybody, either-or, nobody, never, or none. * Mindreading: “She didn’t call me back. Obviously, I made a bad impression.” You convince yourself you know what others are thinking and feeling. Takeaway: Remind yourself that your assumptions are not the truth. You can check out the facts before making conclusions to save yourself a lot of unnecessary worry and stress. * Catastrophic forecasting: “I’m gonna fall flat on my face in the interview.” You forecast the worst possible outcome of a situation without evidence. Takeaway: When you catch yourself worrying over something that hasn’t happened, identify your negative prediction. Then ask yourself, “Where’s the evidence for this conclusion?” * “Shouldy” thinking and “musterbation”: “I should have gone to church on Sunday.” The words you use can make you feel in charge of your career or at the mercy of it. Oppressive words like should, ought, must, and have to can cause you to feel you’re a slave instead of a master of your emotions. Takeaway: Ask yourself if your self-talk opposes or supports you and if it traps or frees you. Replacing negativity with uplifting words turns burdens into opportunities and empowers you. Now, notice the difference when you change just one word from “have to” to “get to”: “I have to work on that project” becomes “I get to work on that project.” * Overgeneralization: “I really screwed up on that sale. I’m such a loser.” You make a sweeping conclusion about your capabilities based on one negative event. Takeaway: When you catch yourself viewing a negative event as a never- ending pattern of defeat, look at the proof. You’ll likely not find evidence for the exaggeration. * Filtering and discounting the positives: “I won top broker of the year, but that was a fluke.” You downplay your accomplishments or positive qualities and dwell on the negatives. Takeaway: Pay attention when negatives outweigh positives and give the positives equal weight. * Magnification or minimization: “I have to get this job promotion, or my career goes down the tubes.” You blow the negative aspects of a stressful situation out of proportion while shrinking your ability to overcome it. Or, on the flip side, you downplay your ability to surmount a stressful situation, “Oh sure, I got the last promotion, but that was because the boss liked me. I don’t know the new boss.” Takeaway: Try to be aware when your outlook about a stressful situation is at one extreme or the other. Take the point of view of an outside observer and put it in perspective. * Blame: “It’s my fault the new employee didn’t work out; I shouldn’t have hired him.” You’re overly responsible and blame yourself for conditions beyond your control. Takeaway: Ask yourself if you’re blaming someone for conditions beyond their control. Then think about how much of the situation you’re truly responsible for. * Emotional reasoning: “I feel hopeless about my job, so it must be over.” You make judgments about people and situations from how you feel. And how you feel about something makes it true in your head, even if there’s proof to the contrary. Takeaway: Acknowledge your feelings first. Then see when you can separate them from the facts to determine if your conclusion is indeed true, “Yes, I’m feeling hopeless about my job, but that doesn’t mean it’s hopeless. There are steps we can take to make it better.” * Labeling: “I blew it with my boss; I’m such a jerk!” Instead of telling yourself that you made a mistake, you tell yourself you are the mistake. You put a negative label on people and situations because of one incident instead of looking at the entire picture. Takeaway: Save labels for cans and jars and be willing to look at the big picture, “I stumbled in the performance review, but my boss knows and appreciates the quality of my work.” Read the complete article available at Thrive Global! [https://community.thriveglobal.com/10-common-mind-traps-we-fall-into-when-were-feeling-stressed/] Reflection: What goes on in your mind when you're stressed? #Stress #Work #Mindset

(Article) A good night's sleep may make it easier to stick to exercise and diet goals

Motivation & Accountability / by comfortableNight4463

May 7th, 2023

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Feedback & Reviews

A very Good listener

very thoughtful

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I appreciated the chance to get my feelings out.

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Eventually followed up with me it was a nice surprise

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