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beethebuzz
2,646 M Hopeful Heart 5
PathStep 60 Compassion hearts60 Forum posts7 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2016 Member sinceJuly 31, 2015
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I'm so confused... Help, please?
Trauma Support / by beethebuzz
Last post
 October 3rd, 2015
...See more I do want to talk about this somehow. I didn't come out about this incident until fairly recently with a family member. One of my family members said it was no shock, a few others said it was a surprise. But anyway... Here's what basically happened: I was in a church and a lady came up to me because I was helping with selling some stuff at the church, and then the lady seemed to be curious about what I was selling. But then she first grabbed my elbow and then grabbed my breast. I was so startled, and nobody else (coincidentally) was watching at that very moment. I was so afraid to yell "Don't touch me!" though I wanted to yell it. She fondled my breast a little and then afterwards the lady left. Nobody else saw what happened... except me. After that, I've been so confused about the incident that happened when I was 17. I want to tell my parents it happened, but at the same time I'm worried about telling them. At first I thought that maybe it didn't affect me that bad, but when I thought about it I realized that it has affected me tremendously. I have horrible, almost constant thoughts where I'm molested and am forced to accept it and try to enjoy it instead of say "No" to it like I want to. And I don't want such thoughts. I know it's affected me and I'm afraid to tell anybody how badly it's affected me. At the same time, I don't want to go to that Church anymore or volunteer for it or anything. I do love being Catholic and I love going to Church, but I don't want to come close to that specific Church where this incident happened (we've only been to this specific Church a few times, but I don't want to go there not even one more time anymore). But in order to stop going to that Church for good... I have to tell my parents. But I'm so afraid of how they'll probably respond, "Why didn't you tell us sooner? You know you can tell us when people do these things." And I don't know what'll happen afterwards or what they'll do afterwards. I don't know who to tell, how to tell it, and the incident does have me confused. What should I do? What can I do? Is this even called "molestation" or is it called something else? I don't know, I don't really understand it, and I'm just so confused. :/ Help, please?
Looking for someone who can specifically help with paraphilia...
General Support / by beethebuzz
Last post
 January 16th, 2016
...See more I've been struggling with a paraphilia for so long. I'm not very interested in taking therapy, because I know I'm far too along in this paraphilia to even consider taking therapy to cure it, but I would really like to speak with somebody about this. I'm 18 years old, and would like an older, mature person (18 or over) to speak with me about. Thanks!
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