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anonyLemon4233
4,756 M Seeking Light 7
PathStep 82 Compassion hearts479 Forum posts519 Forum upvotes473 Current upvotes473 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2022 Member sinceDecember 20, 2021
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Is the sound of voice important to you?
Relationship Stress / by anonyLemon4233
Last post
 April 6th, 2022
...See more After many months away from dating apps I am trying it again now that I feel I'm recovering from a depressive episode. I have been reflecting on how voice impacts what we feel. I know there have been studies showing how attraction or repulsion to a voice can make or break a relationship. I'm completely baffled as online dating is a relatively new thing for me in my late 40s and I had never realised this issue until this week. But I have not dated much in my life. I connected well with a guy and we chatted two weeks and I really felt at ease and was looking forward to eventually meet (he is from a different country). Then he sent me a very brief voice message (just a sentence) and I realised I had imagined a totally different voice and I was shocked by the impact it had on me. Like instant repulsion. Not speaking of accent or tone. Just the sound of it. I felt my heart sink. And I truly am feeling uncomfortable about my reaction. Trying to understand if it is a conscious bias of mine or, as some suggest, an instinctive gut reaction which shows the person to be incompatible. Has anyone gone through this? Did you continue getting to know each other or suspended it? I am thinking of trying a video call next as have no other ideas. It's weird to date online. Usually it takes so many things for a reciprocal attraction when one meetd in person, whereas on an app you just focus on the chatting aspect and that does not feel right.
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EMDR
Trauma Support / by anonyLemon4233
Last post
 February 6th
...See more I have not felt an inkling of gladness in months but today I finally feel glad! After several months of EMDR today I' was finally ready to close the chapter on a childhood memory 🦋. My response today to the memory was so radically different than at the start of this process. I feel relieved. 🌻
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Mental health and dating
Relationship Stress / by anonyLemon4233
Last post
 May 12th, 2022
...See more I'm trying to follow my heart after the suffocating mind took over these months and i really feel a strong need for connection. In past I tried two dating apps but they were quite frustrating experiences. When you describe yourself on a profile or in first few chats do you say something about mental health or you leave the topic to come up only if things get going? I feel it is such an overwhelming part of me that it would be like omitting a very basic detail about me.
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Emotions Anonymous
Depression Support / by anonyLemon4233
Last post
 March 15th, 2022
...See more Anyone out there follows the EA programme? I'm curious to hear from anyone who'd like to share how the experience is or has been. I started attending online meetings recently. But gave not yet embarked on it in a committed way
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Over 40 dating with depression in the picture
35 & Over Community / by anonyLemon4233
Last post
 March 11th, 2022
...See more I guess I really need to hear how over 40's (getting closer to 50..) manage to start stable and healthy relationships especially when anxiety and depression are involved. I seem to have been totally unable to even start dating when I tried online. Maybe there are more suitable dating apps or tips? Unsble to socialise at moment due to depression but even on good days i wouldn't go out to usual hangouts and especially since covid have been nowhere. How do you do this?
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Try dating again?
Relationship Stress / by anonyLemon4233
Last post
 May 13th, 2022
...See more I'm wondering if it is healthy to return to dating apps while still slowly climbing up from a depressive episode. The thing is that after years of rejections and similar patterns of being drawn to unavailable people I know I suffer at the slightest rejection. I had removed the apps when the depression returned full blast and I have zero confidence and cannot imagine anyone wanting to date a person with frequent depressive episodes . Yet for some reason the only thing I seem to be able to think of to maybe start waking me to life again is to find a good connection. But don't know how to balance out the high risk of rejection which in itself triggers depression with that of remaining impervious to life and uninterested in anything around me. This time it is taking much longer for me to climb up
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Crisis anxiety
Anxiety Support / by anonyLemon4233
Last post
 March 5th, 2022
...See more Anyone else feels sick in their stomach with the horror of the mad War raging right now? I'm not in it or next to it but it is shocking how the violence is spreading rapidly. And, God forbid, it may show us things to come. Anyone else goes through lists in their head of who could be suffering most right now? I can picture so many different scenarios :(
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