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Talisca
1,127 M Little Steps 3
PathStep 10 Compassion hearts39 Forum posts6 Forum upvotes6 Current upvotes6 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2024 Member sinceFebruary 2, 2015
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Reconstruction after 20 years dedicated to marriage
Relationship Stress / by Talisca
Last post
 March 1st
...See more After two decades of marriage, with a teenage son, I feel at an emotional crossroads. During all this time, I dedicated myself intensely to our relationship, often sacrificing my own needs to satisfy my wife. However, unfortunately, our marital journey came to an end as she decided to take another path. Over the years, I've given up parts of myself, like my gym workout routine, for the sake of happiness in our home. Now, faced with this new reality, I feel a deep urgency to reconnect with who I am, rediscover my passions and explore all the opportunities I missed. I'm here looking for advice and suggestions on how to start this process of self-care and renewal. How can I rebuild myself after the end of such a significant relationship? What are the best ways to prioritize my well-being and reignite my passion for life?
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Challenges in Marriage: Seeking understanding and guidance
Relationship Stress / by Talisca
Last post
 January 18th
...See more We have been married for 20 years and have a teenage son, we have always had different opinions and tastes, we are very introverted and we communicate little. I like going out and spending time with family and friends, while she prefers to stay at home. We don't have big conversations, when we are together we exchange few words and due to differences of opinion i often choose not to give my opinion so as not to contradict it and conflict with it. Over these 20 years i consider that i stopped doing what i like, i moved away from friends and chose to accompany her and always be present with her and try to make her feel good. She never had a group of friends but in the last 2 years she started spending more time with two colleagues (one single and one divorced) going out for occasional dinners and even organizing a weekend getaway. In April last year we had a change in our habits, she decided to start a diet based on shakes, i didn't adapt and chose to go to the gym. With positive results for both. Since then, i have felt her more tense and aggressive in our conversations, choosing not to want to talk to me and often not being close to me. Initially i thought it could be due to her parents' illness and the proximity of Christmas and the end of the year, when we organize parties to bring the whole family together, but time passes and the problems persist, I see her increasingly moving away from me, avoiding me. Conversations with me and giving very dry answers. Everything i say is wrong and is cause for criticism. She even tries to avoid me staying with her family, and now when i greet her she only accepts if i kiss her on the cheek. I tried to talk to her, and she told me that it was her problem, that she had doubts and that she needed to resolve it. I insisted again that we needed to talk, and she indicated that she would talk when she felt ready. I questioned her why she was angry with me, having told me that it was not because of a particular situation, but rather an accumulation of my situations. I have always respected her and our marriage, I have not done anything I regret, and i have always behaved correctly. I may have said or done something she didn't like, but if I did it I did it without intending to hurt her. I have many doubts about what is happening to our marriage, I am afraid that it has come to an end and I will not be able to recover it. I feel like she is trying to pass the blame to me, indicating that it is a set of my situations that have accumulated, without her saying what it is or having said it previously, in my opinion, diverting from the real problems she has. I would like her help to understand what is happening and what i should do to get this marriage back on track. 
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