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SerenelyClean
533 M Embraced 4
Just a few days away from my 11 month milestone
PathStep 18 Compassion hearts74 Forum posts31 Forum upvotes46 Current upvotes46 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2024 Member sinceMarch 24, 2024
Bio

34 yr old Recovering opioid addict with co-occuring mental health disorders CPTSD, ADHD, GAD, OCD


Recent forum posts
Celebrating 11 months clean n sober tmorror
Addiction Support / by SerenelyClean
Last post
 April 2nd
...See more I'll be celebrating 11 months clean n sober off drugs/alcohol tomorrow. More specifically my 12 years long addiction to OC/heroin/fentanyl. I will give full disclosure, so originally when I got hooked on opioids it was due to being put on pain management  medication. Now that I'm clean, I have nothing to manage my pain that is still very much there. So I do use CBD regularly, as well as consume very small amount of marijuana if I'm unable to sleep because of the pain. I do have a legal medical MJ card so I'm not doing anything illegal, and only using strictly for medical purposes (personally I hate the feeling if being stoned so I avoid it at all costs) but still, I never thought I would make it this long off opioids. Or meth for that fact. *** even alcohol, especially since everytime In the past when I tried coming off opioids, I would always turn to drinking very heavily. So I'm very happy. Frankly I wish I didn't have to use marijuana.. I really do. But the only other thing I could take to manage pain would be gabapentin, and frankly withdrawal from gabapentin feels just as bad as benzo/alcohol withdrawal. So I don't want to go down that route. Frankly I don't want any pharmaceuticals 
A little about me and my backstory
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by SerenelyClean
Last post
 March 26th
...See more I am going to be celebrating 1 year clean on April 30th. I've battled with meth and alcoholism in the past, as well as chronically using everything I could in my younger years. Then when I had kids that came to a stop. However, 12 years ago I was in an accident, and my doctor put me on oxycontin. I was on that for 3.5 years. However when my doctor got in trouble for over prescribing narcotics, I among many others were cut off cold turkey. Never once was I told addiction or dependency were a risk, never once was the term withdrawal even used. I legit thought I was dying. Looking for help, when someone I knew told me what was happening to me... that day was the first time I ever did heroin, and that was also the point at which my entire life fell apart. I could not manage my use with herpin, it was so out of control so fast. And with my previous medical work history, injecting was easy for me, and the most cost effective method. I lost everything, my job, my house, my kids, myself. I tried getting g clean many time to no avail. I would have short periods clean using suboxone but never lasted long. Then about 3.5 years ago, fentanyl took over heroin, you couldn't even get heroin here If u tried. So my addiction turned into fentanyl addiction. Let me tell you, I thought heroin was hard OMG trying to get off fentanyl was unlike anything I've ever experienced and I almost died during detox. And would have had I not been admitted to the hospital. Anyways, I tried and tried and tried but couldn't get clean, until one day, for the first time in my life, i overdosed. It took 4 doses of narcan over the course of 9 minutes to get me breathing on my own again. And the struggles I faced after the fact due to brain hypoxia were even worse. Needless to say, (long story short) I did what I had to do to get clean. Regardless what it took. And here I am, with just shy of an entire year clean from EVERYTHING. It isn't easy, and tbh, sobriety for me is more often than not, miserable because I have co occurring mental health stuff (CPTSD and GAD) and all of that hit me 10 fold... so learning to manage sober has been anything but easy for me. Everyone keeps telling me it will get better and I hope it does. But I can say this, I'm grateful for not waking up dope sick, I'm grateful that I have money to use on things I need or want versus being broke all the time and having to pawn everything just to get well. I have my kids back in my life, and I'm slowly getting there, one day at a time.
Any fellow opioid (primarily fentanyl) addicts in here?
Addiction Support / by SerenelyClean
Last post
 May 7th
...See more I would like to connect with others who have been struggling with opioid addiction, and/or are in recovery. I will be celebrating 1 year clean on April 30th after battling opioid addiction for 12 years. Started out with Mt prescribed oxycontin, and eventually moved to heroin, and then fentanyl. So I would love to connect with others who are also going through this
Just want to make sure I'm in the right place
Addiction Support / by SerenelyClean
Last post
 March 24th
...See more Is this specifically a porn addiction community? Or is this for addiction in general? Asking because I'm a recovering drug addict and just wanted to make sure I'm in the right place ♡
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