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Rebecca
83,451
L Master 10
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Number of ratings46 Number of reviews16 Listens toTeens & Over 18 LanguagesEnglish Listener sinceFeb 20, 2015 Last activein last 6 months GenderFemale PathStep 285 People helped74 Chats179 Group support chats249 Listener group chats845 Forum posts1,091 Forum upvotes2,169
Bio

PLEASE NOTE: I am not accepting personal requests for 1-on-1 chats at this time, due to a busy and unpredictable schedule as well as for self-care reasons. If you need support, please find a listener to your liking here!


 


Hello! My name is Rebecca, I'm 24, and I'm glad you've found me here on 7 Cups! A bit about me, I'm an aspiring author, and in my spare time I like to read, learn new skills, and cheer on my favourite sports teams. 


Disclaimer: For personal reasons, I don't take chats related to self-harm or eating disorders. In order to ensure that you receive the quality of care you deserve while also tending to my own mental health, I ask that you look for another listener here.

Recent forum posts
Domestic Abuse Community Check-In: Week of October 1st
Trauma Support / by Rebecca
Last post
November 16th, 2018
...See more Hi everyone! I've decided to post these check-in threads on Sunday instead of Monday, as with the weekend coming to an end, it makes more sense to me! As per usual, feel free to respond to the usual prompts: If you are currently in an abusive situation and are looking to get out, do you have any goals or steps outlined for the week to help you accomplish this? If you have left your abusive situation, how does it still impact you after? What is the one thing you would say to someone still in an abusive relationship? In addition to this, this week I'd like you to share what helped you to realise you are/were in an abusive relationship. Was it a particular action or behaviour? Was it someone else voicing their concerns? I wish you all the best over the next week!
Domestic Abuse Community Check-In: Week of September 11th
Trauma Support / by Rebecca
Last post
October 1st, 2017
...See more Hi everyone! How have things been for you the past week? Feel free to tell us how you've felt, what's happened, or what your hopes are for the next 7 days! If you are currently in an abusive situation and are looking to get out, do you have any goals or steps outlined for the week to help you accomplish this? If you have left your abusive situation, how does it still impact you after? What is the one thing you would say to someone still in an abusive relationship? I wish you all the best over the next week!
Domestic Abuse Community Check-In: Week of September 4th
Trauma Support / by Rebecca
Last post
September 12th, 2017
...See more Hi everyone! Apologies for posting this a day or two late, depending on where you live. Better late than never, though! How have things been for you the past week? Feel free to tell us how you've felt, what's happened, or what your hopes are for the next 7 days! If you are currently in an abusive situation and are looking to get out, do you have any goals or steps outlined for the week to help you accomplish this? If you have left your abusive situation, how does it still impact you after? What is the one thing you would say to someone still in an abusive relationship? I wish you all the best over the next week!
How to Support Someone Facing Domestic Abuse
Trauma Support / by Rebecca
Last post
July 16th, 2018
...See more How to Support Someone Facing Domestic Abuse You think someone you know, someone you love, is experiencing domestic abuse. Youve looked up the signs and noticed changes, and now youre almost positive. Or, they feel they can trust you, and have confided in you. So, what do you do? How do you talk to someone about this? Domestic abuse is something we already struggle to talk about casually, but when you know someone who might be facing it first hand, its even more serious, and even scarier. And if you find it scary, know that it is much scarier and harder for a survivor. There are ways you can help though, which well discuss below. Start the Conversation Starting the conversation if your family member or friend hasnt opened up yet can be very uncomfortable, but reaching out can also help in the long run. The Maine Coalition to End Domestic Violence suggests telling your loved one what you see. Inquire about a physical injury, or changed behaviour. Let them know you are concerned, and let them know you are there for support. Don't Judge Most important to note, if you find yourself in a position where you are concerned for someone you know, please do not be frustrated if they are hesitant or not ready to leave the situation. There are a number of reasons a survivor might struggle to leave. Abusers work very hard to minimize their victims, so your friend or family might feel like they cannot survive on their own. In addition to this, a victim/survivor might be fearing for their safety. According to the National Network to End Domestic Violence, a victims risk of being killed will be significantly higher if they have just left or are trying to leave their abuser. In fact, an average of 3 women die at the hands of their current or former partner daily. Remember, if your friend or family member is in abusive relationship, this means their partner is exploiting an unequal of balance of power and control. Trying to force your loved one to leave is just one more person trying to control them. The decision to leave their partner and abuser has to come from them. Be Supportive One of the most helpful things you can do if you suspect someone is facing domestic abuse is to be there for them. Be there to talk, to hug, to cry, to listen. Be what your loved one needs. Make yourself available for them. And, if you have the means, offer them assistance and support if they do choose to leave, either through providing shelter, food, financial assistance, or just companionship. The process of leaving will be difficult, and being alone could make it even harder. Educate Yourself Another thing you can do is educate yourself on what resources are available, so you can pass them on to your friend or family member if needed. It might be risky for them to search for a hotline or shelter themselves; if their abuser saw it, it could get them hurt. Learn about any hotlines for your country, any shelters nearby, local laws, and programs there to help. If child custody is at all involved, find out if your area has programs for free legal services for women leaving domestic abuse. Empower Them Create an environment where your loved one feels empowered. Like I mentioned above, the decision to leave can only be made by the survivor. Realize that this decision will be hard to make, and will require a lot of strength. Rather than forcing your loved one to do something, help them regain their confidence. Remind them that they do have power and control, even if their partner makes them think otherwise. Be Patient Lastly, be patient. It takes an average of 7-13 attempts before a survivor is able to leave. Your help and support probably will not make things better right away. Gaining independence and leaving an abusive partner can be a long and trying process. Just remember that for every bit of frustration you might experience, that you are helping someone not be alone during a very difficult time in their life. Resources Used: http://nnedv.org/downloads/Stats/NNEDV_FAQaboutDV2010.pdf https://www.womensaidni.org/domestic-violence/frequently-asked-questions/#10 http://everydayfeminism.com/2014/01/how-to-help-a-loved-one-experiencing-domestic-violence/ http://www.safetotalk.org.uk/professionals/good-practice-guidelines-when-supporting-a-victim-of-domestic-violence-and-abuse/ http://www.mcedv.org/what-do-if-you-suspect-someone-being-abused http://www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk/support-a-friend-or-family-member-experiencing-domestic-violence.aspx
Domestic Abuse Community Check-In: Week of August 28th
Trauma Support / by Rebecca
Last post
September 11th, 2017
...See more Hey there, everyone! How is your week going? Do you have any goals for the week to come? Let us know and share how you are feeling below!
What is Domestic Abuse?
Trauma Support / by Rebecca
Last post
August 23rd, 2017
...See more Domestic abuse is something that anyone can encounter, and yet so many of us struggle to recognize the signs of it. That being said, one of the first steps to ending the abuse is to know and acknowledge the signs. So, what is domestic abuse? What is Domestic Abuse? Simply put, domestic abuse occurs when one person in an intimate relationship or marriage tries to control their partner. Oftentimes, when we picture domestic abuse, our minds might immediately travel to thoughts of domestic violence; however, domestic abuse can be much more than physical violence. Some of the other forms of abuse (there are many) that can be used to dominate or control a partner are emotional, verbal, financial, or sexual abuse. Who can be a Victim of Domestic Abuse? Anyone can be a victim of domestic abuse. It can appear in any kind of relationship (heterosexual, homosexual, etc.), within all age ranges, within any ethnicity, and within any economic class. Men, women, and non-binary people can all be abused by their partners. All of this is just to say that domestic abuse is never okay, regardless of who it's coming from. You deserve to feel safe in your relationship, no matter who you are. What are the Signs of an Abusive Relationship? There are a lot of signs of an abusive relationship. You don't need to have all the signs in your relationship for it to be abusive, but the more that apply, the more likely it is that your relationship might be unhealthy. You might be in an abusive relationship if: - You are afraid of your partner - You avoid mentioning certain topics to prevent angering your partner - You feel like you are never enough for your partner. or can't do anything right - You believe you deserve to be punished and mistreated - Your partner tries to humiliate you - Your partner criticizes you - Your partner doesn't let you have an opinion - Your partner blames you for their abusive behaviour - Your partner has an unpredictable temper - Your partner hurts you, or threatens to hurt you - Your partner threatens to commit suicide if you leave them - Your partner forces you to have sex - Your partner controls what you do, where you go, and who you spend time with - Your partner limits your access to things like money, the phone, internet or vehicles - Your partner stops you from working or keeping a job - Your partner threatens to kill you What Help is there for Domestic Abuse Victims? If, after reading this, you think you might be in abusive relationship, there are resources out there to help you, and different choices you can make. If you fear for your physical safety (or that of any children you may have), one option is to report your abuse to the police. That being said, it is understandable if you don't feel this is the safest or most appropriate option for you. If you want to learn about other resources that might be available for you in your community, you can look for shelters that house victims of domestic abuse. Many of these shelters are targeted towards women and their children, but there are some out there that support men who've been hurt in an abusive relationship. There are also shelters that are specifically LGBTQ+ friendly. These shelters have a variety of services, but many provide you with shelter and food as you try to get back on your feet after leaving an abusive relationship. There is an international directory of domestic abuse agencies here [http://www.hotpeachpages.net/], if you would like to look into your local services. If you aren't able to leave your abuser but need to vent, you can also call a hotline. They can listen, and have training on the specifics of domestic abuse. Not only can the understand your experiences to a higher degree than the average person, but they can also help you come up with a list of resources and a safety plan if you have to leave. There is a growing list of international hotlines here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/DomesticAbuseSupportCommunity_121/DomesticAbuseResourcesandMedia_1045/ListofInternationalDomesticAbuseHotlinesContribute_65972/], or you can search on google for a hotline specific to your country or region. Lastly, you can always chat with a listener here at 7 Cups. If you don't need specific resources or guidance, this can be a great help. Just knowing that someone else knows about your experiences and cares about you can be a huge boost. Conclusion I hope that after reading this, you feel you have learned something new about domestic abuse. If you think you might be or are in an abusive relationship, I am hopeful that you now have some knowledge that keeps you a bit safer. Thanks for reading, and I wish you all the best.
Are you a Victim or a Survivor of Child Abuse? Share Your Story and Seek Support
Trauma Support / by Rebecca
Last post
February 27th, 2021
...See more Are you a victim or a survivor of child abuse? This is a place where you can introduce yourself, share your story, and seek support.
Feedback & Reviews
Awesome
Becca is so amazing
Amazing listner helped me out a lot!!💓👏
Knows what she's talking about, understands literally everything, and stays positive.
Awesome person, there should be more like her in this world :)
She was really helpful with my problems. She cared a lot about me and that was cool. Thank you Rebecca for helping me :)
I feel so much better now!
this listener is amazing! they helped me so much with self harm, I'm happy I connected with them c:
RebeccaEmily is just truly wonderful in the way she cares for people, she's the best
my favourite listener (:
RebeccaEmily is such an awesome person, really smart, caring, attentive and I feel like talking to a friend with her, thank you for being here for me Rebecca!
BECCA IS SO AWESOME! She's the best listener EVER and always takes her time to talk to me
Very helpful. I appreciate her for helping me out and making sure everything was ok. :)
She was great. She really helped me with what I was going through. She responded very quickly.
Really helped me out with my problem and understand what I could do to make it better and less stressful.
A very kind and compassionate person with great listening qualities. I highly recommend anyone in need of being listened to, to speak to her. She's a great listener who understands you, happy to have met her! -PP
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