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RanjitMore
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PathStep 1 Compassion hearts17 Forum posts6 Forum upvotes7 Current upvotes7 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2023 Member sinceOctober 30, 2023
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God (Krishna) orders me
Religion & Spirituality / by RanjitMore
Last post
 October 9th
...See more I have been practicing bhakti sadhana (practice of loving child Krishna/God's Form as His mother) for the last 10 years. I am a 32 year old homosexual male. Although God is omnipotent and omniscient, He takes on human-like limitations and trappings to better facilitate love to develop between Him and the soul. That means, He can bleed, be hurt, and has emotional attachment--and all the sentimentality that comes with it--to His precious devotee, aka me. Against this background, God has been guiding me since 2014. I received many orders/signals early on in the relationship, but none were as disturbing as what I'm being told to do since 2022. Krishna tells me to order in fatty food, not exercise, and not have a shower every day. I know how ridiculous it sounds, but He claims He cannot see me in the slightest discomfort (Idk what bearing my parents' being alive has on that). It had all gone away--and my life had become as easy, free and comfortable as it ever could be--on the 14th of march, 2023. Even though His orders vanished, He still remained in my heart, inciting positive things and ways of practicing His devotion. But the horror started again 4 days ago.  If I don't do it, it will not bode well for my spiritual future--even though I cannot foresee in the tiniest how that would affect it. Also, if I don't do it, He (my precious darling child Krishna) appears *** and mangled to my mind's eye. I don't hear any voices, neither do I hallucinate. God communicates messages into my mind and I know what He wants to convey. It seems ridiculous that an imaginary child's well-being can have such a significant bearing on my decisions--especially when it comes to choosing between him and my own blood relatives--but you must understand that this is a commonplace trait found in the land of India where the tradition of Vaishnava bhakti (devotion to Krishna) is so prevalent. I am at my wit's end.
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