LostinTranslation90 Member Profile

Kind Words/Motivation/Advice?

Anxiety Support / by LostinTranslation90

Thursday

Should I Stay or Should I Go

Anxiety Support / by LostinTranslation90

July 9th

...See more Hi everyone! I hope you are all doing well! I’m struggling with something that’s causing a lot of anxiety, and I could really use an outside perspective. I’m just not sure what to do at all - I know what I want to do, but I just don’t know if I should. The more I think about it, the less I feel like I should go, but I know I’ll be so disappointed if I don’t. TW: mention of politics, homophobic family There’s a Pride event in a few days I wanted to go to. It’s in a new area I have never driven to by myself before. I live with my family, and they are not safe to come out to. I really wanted to go to a Pride event this year. I’m graduating this year, and next summer I have no idea what my situation will look like, but I’ll probably be working full time as opposed to only part time, so I’ll have a lot less time than I do now. That, and without going into it, I’m very concerned about the potential political climate next year, and my hope is that this is just the anxiety, but I keep worrying that this may be my last chance to go. However, my family is a little overprotective. I’m an adult, I’m in my 20s (22+) but they need me to let them know before I go for a drive, they need to know where I plan to go, and they need me to let them know when I arrive and when I leave. They use location tracking on my phone, so they can see where I am. I thought I disabled it, but usually they know when I do and ask me to turn it back on - they haven’t done this, so my concern is that they can still see my location. The other problem is that they wanted to go do something (that I really don’t enjoy but do anyway for them) that same evening as the Pride event, so they might just tell me I can’t go out, and I have no idea if they’re going to need me to help with stuff all day, or if I’ll have a chance to leave for a few hours. I really, really don’t want to lie to them - I’m bad at lying, I’m super uncomfortable doing so, and if I lie about where I’m going and they find out, they’re going to be really upset. But they’re not safe to come out to, I already know they won’t want me driving to the area without one of them to show me where to go (it’s a nice area, it’s just that they don’t like me going to new places without someone with me), and I know I’m going to be super disappointed with myself if I don’t go. I know I can always ask, and if they say no, then at least I tried, but I would still have to potentially lie when they ask where I’m going, and if they say yes, I’m stuck lying, and if something happens, they’re going to find out. Being vague doesn’t really work, either - they just keep asking questions, and need specifics. I just don’t know if it’s really a smart decision - writing all this out, it sounds better and safer to not go and hope I can try again next year. But then, I know I’m going to regret not going and I’m going to be so disappointed in myself, and I don’t know how to move on from that. There’s a lot I’ve missed out on because of my family being overprotective, not helped by my own anxiety, and I have a lot of resentment about it, and disappointments and regrets. Does anyone have any thoughts, please?

(Disappointed vent) Why is it so hard to be social on campus :-(

LGBTQ+ / MOGII Support / by LostinTranslation90

September 11th, 2023

LostinTranslation's One Line a Day Thread ❤

Journals & Diaries / by LostinTranslation90

August 22nd, 2023

How do i leave the house to get help with my mental health?

General Support / by LostinTranslation90

March 28th, 2023

...See more Hi everyone, I hope you're all doing well and that you've had a good day! So, I can't leave the house without telling my parents, but I really wanted to drive to my college before May to look into some mental health resources. I've wondered for a few years if I might have ADHD, and I found out a few months ago that my college offers ADHD evaluations. The problem is, a few years ago I discussed the possibility of my having ADHD with a doctor, and she recommended that we tell my mom, and when we got back home my mom said she didn't think I had it, and we never looked into it (I had no idea where to even begin to find those resources and I was a new driver). And trying to get treatment for my now-diagnosed OCD was awful. After having a horrible year from *** where my OCD was so, so severe, and my parents didn't really notice anything, I finally got the courage to ask my mom for treatment, and she roadblocked me and told me that she would need to look into the service first. I sent her all the information that afternoon, and it took her six months to remember that I asked for this treatment, even though I would bring it up from time to time, and I tried to tell her a little bit about how it made me feel without going into the really bad symptoms, but she seemed to remember/allow me to get treatment when my older brother was struggling with his own mental health. She said she wasn't doing it because of him, and it was just that I was managing it so well that she kept forgetting, but it didn't really make me feel any better, and it sure felt like she only remembered so I could test this treatment out before looking into it for him or something. And then the whole time she kept telling me that everyone goes through what I was going through and "you're not special, no offense." She would say it like a joke but it kind of hurt, and she would keep saying it every time anything related to OCD would come up, until I was finally diagnosed with it. She even tried to tell me that some therapists just diagnose people so they can get money. I don't know if that's true or not, but I don't think that's something you should say under those circumstances. So I really don't want to tell her that I want to drive up to my college for an ADHD evaluation (and some other resources I really firmly believe I need and would benefit greatly from). But I really don't want to lie. I tried looking to see if there were any events at my college going on that I could go to that I could also schedule those things for the same day, but I didn't really see anything that stood out. I don't really know what to do. I really wanted to do all these things this semester because I know if I just put it off any more I'll end up worse off, regretting that I didn't go, and I don't know when the next time I could go might be, so I really believe it isn't impossible that the whole year could go by and I still won't have sought this treatment. And worse, I'm graduating next year (end of May), so I think I really should have already been using these resources. And it's not impossible to find these resources outside of my college, but I would have no idea where to begin, and going to my college is way less suspicious and easier to get to. Plus, my location sharing is on, and they get a notification if it's turned off, so they can see everywhere I go and if I am supposed to be at an event and I'm at a different building I'm worried my mom might ask why I'm there, and if I take a long time I'm concerned she'll start checking in and I'll feel pressured to get back home. And there's no way I'm going to drive to another area entirely when they will know that i am not on campus. And virtual meetings are difficult because my bedroom is right above my older brother's and if he hears me talking he'll get angry, and my parents might hear. (And it isn't like I'm scheduling things for seven in the morning, the earliest meetings I have, which don't happen all that frequently and are for things like advising, are maybe 11am.) I'm just afraid of how angry they'll be if they find out I did this behind their backs or something, and I really don't want to lie. There is some group work coming up for one of my classes, and I could always suggest we meet on campus (especially because the last time there was group work for this class, we had so many technological issues that we had to meet on campus anyway) and also schedule these things for that day? I am fully planning to ask about the cost of these resources, too. I thought these things were free for students but I am fully planning on double checking. I hope they're free for students. I am on my parents' health insurance, but I really don't want to wait another six months or have to argue with my mom that I do need this because i needed to ask her permission. I've had counseling before at my college and my mom accepted it because i told her it was for school stuff, so maybe i could just say it's counseling and leave it at that? I don't know. I feel kind of all over the place right now and i don't know if i'm overreacting or overthinking. i feel kind of embarrassed to be posting this in case i realize later that i was overreacting, but i really don't know what to do. i really don't want to lie, but i think i need a reason to be on campus that they'll accept, otherwise i don't think they'll get me go to campus just because. i just feel kind of lost and stuck, and i don't really know what to do or where to go.

Wish I could live in fantasy

Depression Support / by LostinTranslation90

December 14th, 2022

Please help need to cope the cat I wanted was adopted and I can't stop crying

Depression Support / by LostinTranslation90

October 30th, 2022

...See more i've always wanted a cat and for the past few months my parents have been talking about getting a cat and showing me and my brothers pictures so on thursday we went to go see one and he was everything we wanted in a cat and he was just a tiny kitten but my brothers put up so much opposition and were huge pains about it and kept telling us it will turn out badly and we're rushing into it so on saturday my mom and i went to go adopt him and we found out he had been adopted just that morning so im heartbroken and i cant stop crying and it just does not help that it feels like everyone's moved on from it today and they keep saying it just wasn't meant to be and we'll get another cat and my brothers dont feel bad at all and they dont even seem to realize that a big part of why im so upset is because of them and i just dont feel ready at all and the worst part of all of it is that afterwards my mom and i went to a different shelter just to look at other cats and play with them and there were some that were really sweet and friendly and now on thursday we're going to go look at them again and adopt one and i am not ready at all right now, i feel like i'm being forced to get over it and pull myself together by thursday instead of getting time to be upset and i just dont want to get out of bed at all and i cant stop crying but they want me to go outside and rake leaves and all i want is to go sit outside with our chickens but if i go outside they'll expect me to start doing yard work and they just keep telling me why it's actually working out better because we have more time to set everything up and the cats we're looking at are older and their personalities are more developed and they wont get into mischief but it just feels like my brothers point was proven and that they did nothing wrong and have nothing to feel sorry for and it feels like they just want me to stop being upset and they keep telling me that next weekend i'll have a cat to snuggle with and that it'll be fixed and i just want to be upset but i have to help outside and go to church today and i dont even know if this is reasonable, im 21 years old and heartbroken over a cat that wasnt even mine but i wanted a cat so badly and i was so excited and i even asked my parents if this was a sure thing because i didnt want to get my hopes up and then it turns out badly, but they were sure and we were going to go not to look but to actually adopt so it was so close and i just have no idea how to cope please help how do i get over this by thursday i do apologize if i sound unreasonable and resentful im just so heartbroken right now and i just am freaking out because i dont want to adopt a cat and then still be heartbroken and be unable to give it the love it deserves

Bio

Recent forum posts

Considering Therapy?

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Don’t miss a message!

The 7 Cups app is available on iOS and Android

Bio

Recent forum posts

Considering Therapy?

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Personal Conversation Requests

General Conversation Requests

New Messages