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Kullen
253 M Embraced 2
PathStep 9 Compassion hearts41 Forum posts15 Forum upvotes12 Current upvotes12 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2023 Member sinceSeptember 17, 2022
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Friendless and Lonley
35 & Over Community / by Kullen
Last post
 January 12th, 2023
...See more No friends and lonely from a friendship breakdown in August last year. Life hasn't really been the same for me anyways - my partner just gets on with it like the friendship never mattered. 6 years of friendship (close friendship like treated as family) all over in a click of a Finger. Won't go into detail as its very long winded and emotional just wanna leave 2022 behind me. But why is it so hard to move on without any friends - i mean i have friends (***) but none really inperson maybe the odd person you say hello to as you know them but thats it.
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Why me - What have I done to make them hate me so much!
Relationship Stress / by Kullen
Last post
 September 25th, 2022
...See more February 2017 - met up for the 1st time hit it off instantly became the best of friends she was like the sister i never had. (I have siblings but do not have anything to do with them). Her whole family was treat like our brother and sister, aunt and uncle to our boys and we to their children. September 2018 - youngest started school and I started a new job by February 2019 I'd had a breakdown was so depressed and my anxiety was sky high, i went on antidepressants and went through counselling. Came through the otherside with the same bunch of friends minus the job (bullying - pulling me up in front of work colleagues for small things within my work that I'd done wrong or shouldn't of done after being told to do them). Through counselling also found out that I'd had postnatal depression after having my eldest son in 2012 but as the doctor told me to get on with it basically buried the feelings and did that for my years until something snapped! March 2020 - Covid Hit also coming off the antidepressants at the same time as being told the nation was on lockdown nothing much changed apart from starting a new job in January. Fast forward - March 2022 had a miscarriage round best friends house she wasn't there at the time was out at a friends child's birthday party. Went through it with the help of my husband and her's at the time husband. Was the worse time of my life ambulance was called they were really nice and helpful. GP on the other hand were not! Friend tried to be there for me on the day when she came back hours have the ambulance crew had left after confirming miscarriage plus the Wednesday after it happened and then for roughly 2 weeks I just shut down I didn't want anybody near me not even my partner, I went back to work after having a week off and threw myself into my job to forget. April 2022 - Grown apart even further had a massive talk with friend who at the time was going through a separation tried to get things back on track but took comfort and emotional support from a male friend instead and we grew further and further apart. Things just went from bad to worse even tho we'd be round her house after school pick up everyday just felt like she wasn't really there and constantly on her phone so we just tried to go along with it and see the kids and spend time with them. August 2022 - Breakdown of friendship over no idea, her (ex) husband upset me and I walked out of "their" house and stood by the fence outside "their" house for an hour crying my heart out. While everybody was inside celebrating her son's birthday my partner came outside and stood with me for the entire hour just holding me not talking just being there. Within this hour i was uncontrollably crying to the point the tears just kept coming and coming no end in sight. He went back inside to tell them that we were leaving and for our son's to grab their stuff. She got in his face and asked why to which he was like she is upset I'm not going into details but we need to leave, we're talk about it another time. She shouted at him and he shouted back (he is not the sort of person just to stay calm and walk away when somebody gets in his face) basically telling her and my so called friends that none of them came out to see how I was or anything. She then brought up the miscarriage saying that she was there for me and that I pushed her away "when were you there for her" he asked her (he was there he went through it she couldn't be bothered to leave a party to be with me to help me go through the worse thing in my life that she'd been through a few times). Then she threw accusations at him that we'd spoken to her ex behind her back saying stuff to him that she'd said to us, when my partner asked her what she was talking about she couldn't provide the information and just shouted at him in front of our children to get the fuck out of her house and her life. September 2022 - Back to school received a text from one of her friends telling me that I should be ashamed of myself for talking to a child and doing what I did, I responded with what have I done that I haven't seen the child that I was meant to of done something to and in response got a thumbs up and then blocked. So I tried to talk to so called friend (now ex friend) about her child to be told that I never spoke to her I saw her on the playground and rolled my eyes at her and ignored her when she tried to come over to say hello. Now I would never intentionally ignore a child especially one that I have treat as a niece for the past 5 years! The thing that hurts the most and made me so angry is that she didn't come to be directly and talk to me face to face she slagged me off behind my back and then I receive a hurtful text from her friend. To this day 4 weeks later I still don't know why she has turned her back on us and why she has 1 by 1 turned our friends against us. They have all taken her side over something we can't even defend ourselves against as we have no idea what we've done wrong. Throughout the whole of August up until the eventful day we had tried to make arrangements with her for family days out which were either responded with a we're see if we can afford it or cancelled the day before or on the actual day. I just feel like she'd made new friends that wouldn't say no to her and would give her the answers she wanted to hear instead of what she needed to hear and that is why she's completely cut us off, it's not just us though that she's hurt. After her shouting at their dad both our boys came out crying their hearts out and saying that she laid into their dad in front of them, my eldest has anxiety issues and can have quite low mood at times and he had an anxious moment on the playground and needed to ask her a question but was scared as he remembered what he'd heard and seen her act like just a few weeks prior. When you go through the hardest times in life you definitely know who you can and can't rely on. They always say blood is thicker than water, sometimes its not but in this case blood was there when water wasn't!
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Massive friendship break up
Friendship Support / by Kullen
Last post
 September 29th, 2022
...See more I don't know what I've done to have this treatment from a person who was like a sister to me for the past 5/6 years. Myself and family were at her house for her son's birthday party a few weeks back, her (ex) husband upset me and I walked out of their house and was outside for an hour literally crying my eyes out the only person who came out to see how I was was my partner. I was so down that I couldn't stop crying and got worse and worse over the course of an hour that I asked my partner if we could leave as I really didn't want to go back inside. He went back in and asked our son's to grab their stuff as we were leaving, our friend asked him why we were leaving of which he said she's upset and we need to leave and told her that he didn't want to get into the reasons as to why I was so upset as they had a house full of guests. Of which she got in his face and started shouting at him so he did the same and said to her and all of the other people that none of them (many so called friends) came out to see if I was OK, her (ex) didn't bother to come out and apologise either. I had a miscarriage in March which was also brought up during the argument and was used against me as I was pushing her away when she tried to help me (I had the miscarriage at her house while she was at a friend's kids party - my partner and her husband at the time helped me through it while it was happening). She also threw accusations at my partner saying that we were going behind her back and talking shit to her ex husband about what she'd said to us of which my partner responded with what shit and she couldn't acknowledge anything that we were meant to have done. She basically told my partner in front of my children to get out of her house and her life. Fast forward 4 weeks and I've been accused of rolling my eyes and ignoring her daughter on the playground at school pick-up (this came from somebody else who she'd slagged me off to who sent me a horrid text telling me that I should be ashamed of myself) I sent this text to my ex friend to be told what I had done or not done as didn't even know I'd done it. If it had bothered her that much talk to me directly about it don't go behind my back and slag me off for something I didn't even know I'd done, this was 2 weeks ago. Present day still don't talk and no explanation still as to what has happened for her to turn her back on us, also 1 by 1 her friends (were mine also) have turned their backs on us and taken her side over whatever she has told them. It's hard as 4 years ago I had a breakdown and had to have counselling and antidepressants and these friends came through the other side with me and then this happens - I guess you know who your friends aren't when you need them the most!
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