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Jem91
43,137 M Crossing Mileposts 4
PathStep 157 Compassion hearts423 Forum posts60 Forum upvotes61 Current upvotes61 Age GroupAdult Last activeDecember, 2017 Member sinceOctober 16, 2014
Recent forum posts
I was raped TW
Trauma Support / by Jem91
Last post
January 9th, 2015
...See more I never really thought I would utter those words but it's what happened to me. A recent incident has triggered these painful memories and after talking to a couple of listeners here recently I realised I need to stop hiding from the truth but I'm not ready to do that in real life so here goes. At the beginning of my final year of university (October 2013), I went on a night out, I left the night early and headed home, I bumped into a guy who seemed friendly, I recognised him from around campus (it's a small campus), he helped me walk home, I let him into my room and he forced himself on me. I tried to push him away from me but I wasn't strong enough, even though I had been drinking I repeatedly said no but he told me to shut up and just enjoy it. he left once he was finished and told me to keep quiet, I just laid there shocked and confused. I know I should have reported him but I didn't, I felt so ashamed and like it was my fault. to this day only one friend knows what happened to me and I tend to avoid the subject.. from there my life seemed to be on a downward spiral, I was hurt and angry and confused, I fell into depression, struggled with the pressure of uni, I started self harming to cope  I didn't sleep and if I did I woke from nightmares and worse still I saw him regularly around campus. we never spoke again but I know he talked about me.  I still feel ashamed and responsible and like it's my fault I was hurt. I feel like I should have known better and not put myself in such a vulnerable position. I'm struggling so much right now, I would really appreciate any hugs. Thank you for reading Jem
Through a friend
Newbie Hub / by Jem91
Last post
November 29th, 2016
...See more A friend on another support forum :) I'm really glad she suggested it.
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