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Exist56
2,076 M Hopeful Heart 2
PathStep 23 Compassion hearts88 Forum posts158 Forum upvotes159 Current upvotes159 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2019 Member sinceDecember 30, 2015
Bio
35, male. USA.
Struggling with depression and anxiety, especially social anxiety, which has been extra rough after being laid off from my previous job.
Recent forum posts
Looking for a listener, ongoing maybe?
General Support / by Exist56
Last post
 June 29th, 2017
...See more Hi, thanks for taking the time to click on my post I'm getting some major bouts anxiety and depression and I don't have anyone to listen or vent to, a lot of which is related to being out of work and the feelings of uncertainty. I don't have family or friends that I can really open up without judgement. Preferabbly closer to 30, or at lest 25 and up. I'm 35 and trying to make a career shift or at least get back on my feet jobwise asap, so If you have personal experience in that area, that would be great, but not nesseccary.
Being 'gaslighted' (just learned what this was)
General Support / by Exist56
Last post
 January 3rd, 2017
...See more My oldest sister has been gaslighting me since I was little here and there. I don't think it was always concious or even malicious. We're grown adults now so I'm more capable of dealing with it. Still, I feel resentful about this. I had never known there was a specific name for what she was doing. Questioning another's sense of reality in attempt to undermine or controll them emotionally is called 'gaslighting'. Usually narcissistic and sociopathic people do this. For years all these comments like "are you sure that's what happened", "well I don't remember that happening", "you're being oversensitive", etc, would make me angry beyond belief and make me start to question my own memory when I was around her.
Persisting Guilt & Rumination
Depression Support / by Exist56
Last post
 December 4th, 2016
...See more Somehow I can't shrug this lingering feeling inside and it's becoming a big problem. I'm not even sure if this is depression issue or anxiety, but it feels like a mix. I struggle with both of these. I don't know what forgiving yourself means or how to just let go of things and let time get some distance. I hold onto so many mistakes and transgressions and have repeated mistakes that perpetuate the whole cycle of feeling terrible. I feel like I deserve any bad things that happen. I have done some lousey things to people, nothing horrible, but definitely selfish and foolish things. I don't know how to let go if I have wronged someone and not obsess over remedying the situation, even it can't be done.
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