DonnasDaughter Member Profile

...See more One incredibly impactful struggle are my interpersonal relationships. Especially romantic. It was only recently that my Dr. helped shine light on some pattern behavior of mine. Even with this insight I'm still currently stuck in a situation, again, that I'm desperately trying to resolve. I know the situation is holding me back from my full potential in recovery and even worse I'm causing hurt to the people I love the most, again. I've only been in long term relationships. They are completely seamless, moving from one to the next and the pattern goes like this: Intense whirlwind beginning- temporary commitment and idealization-withdrawal from the relationship and devaluation-continued search for my true love. This pattern leads me to hurt and hurt the people in love the most. Starting a new relationship while still in my current relationship. Leading double lives, feeling confused and angry with myself, acting out...this part goes on sometimes for years. Despite all my efforts to prevent them or be honest the same scenario repeats. Even if I am completely happy in my relationship, somewhere along the lines the lights go out and when they come back on I find myself in these ugly triangles, with only myself to blame. I feel destined to fail sometimes...im still stuck today and have searched endlessly to resolve this situation. I'm lost. Again.

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