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Cain96
941 M Little Steps 1
PathStep 8 Compassion hearts95 Forum posts122 Forum upvotes117 Current upvotes117 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2024 Member sinceDecember 16, 2020
Recent forum posts
Making Friends at Work
Anxiety Support / by Cain96
Last post
 August 8th, 2022
...See more I work around literally dozens of people. I've been there since January, yet I haven't made any friends. It must be the way that I carry myself. I try to be nice and friendly to people, but I must be doing something that makes me look unapproachable. People will see me, but maybe two or three people will actually wave or say hi to me. It rarely ever goes beyond that though. Maybe I look pissed off all the time. There's no way for me to check, so I don't know. I know I need to just "put myself out there" like people say, but it scares me. I'm still scarred from being bullied and ostracized during my school years. I try to remind myself that I'm not in school anymore, but I'm still distrustful and wary of others. I'm not good at small talk either. It's hard for me to relate to other people. I feel like an alien trying to blend in with humans. I need to have more confidence when I talk to people, but i just dont have anything that gives me confidence. My life is pretty boring and kinda sad, so I don't like to talk about myself much. It could be worse, but I still hate being me. I have two friends that like me for being me, but I rarely get to see or speak with them. I don't really feel comfortable talking about this with them either. I don't want to be a downer in their lives. I guess I should see a therapist. I've been trying to work on these issues by myself, but I feel like I haven't made much progress. Are there any other ways to be more outgoing and social? How do I care less about what other people think of me? I've always wanted to be popular and well-liked by many people, but it seems like I've only experienced the opposite so far in life. Does that desperation make me unattractive as well?
My Fault(s)?
Relationship Stress / by Cain96
Last post
 March 10th, 2022
...See more I don't know what is wrong with me. I just don't understand how to date or stay grounded with realistic expectations. There's a girl at work that I want to ask out, and I'm already setting myself up for disappointment. I've barely talked to her, but I'm already day-dreaming about our future together. It only just now dawned on me that she might already be in a relationship or she just won't be into me. I have a hard time dealing with rejection, so I don't ask out many girls to begin with. But it's like everytime it happens, it's just another confirmation that I'm not worth being loved. It's not like I'm trying to go for girls way out of my league either. A friend once told me that once I fall for a girl, then I fall hard, which I agree with. I'm not sure why I do this. Maybe it's out of desperation? I'm not able to love myself properly and I'm just looking for validation from other people. It just feels like everything I'm doing is wrong. I've tried dating apps, but I'm terrible at creating an interesting profile. I suck at pictures and I suck at creating a bio. Past that, I'm very awkward and not good at conversation; especially under stress. All of this just compounds and makes me think I'm not really ready to date yet. Maybe I'm just overthinking things like usual. I just feel so lost when it comes to this stuff.
Dating Anxiety
Relationship Stress / by Cain96
Last post
 January 24th, 2022
...See more I have all of these issues and doubts about myself. I really do feel bad for the next girl to take a chance on me. I see myself either being too emotional to deal with or too reserved to the point where I seem uninterested. It's like pulling teeth to have a normal conversation with a stranger already. I feel uncomfortable opening up to people unless I feel them out for a few days first. I'm awkward in conversation and it's really hard for me to make the first move. Es
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