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BeautifulAndBroken2022
328 M Embraced 3
PathStep 14 Compassion hearts41 Forum posts22 Forum upvotes24 Current upvotes24 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2022 Member sinceJune 22, 2022
Recent forum posts
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Feeling really down tonight
Depression Support / by BeautifulAndBroken2022
Last post
 August 28th, 2022
...See more My husband makes me feel like garbage. He has been doing it on a daily basis for awhile now. He says the meanest stuff to me and then continues to say that what he said isn’t a put down. In all honesty, it is. I’m tired and worn out. It has taken a toll on me and I honestly believe this is what has lead me into being depressed and hating myself. I know the easy solution, if you want to call it easy- it’s to leave. But how do I leave when I have been with him practically my whole life?! He is the only one I ever truly loved. We have a child together and that makes it harder. I’m lost. I’m hurt and heartbroken. I can’t take it anymore. I do everything for him. Guess I’m not good enough. Never will be. And I know the saying is I will be good enough for the right person, but that person was him. He was my one. His parents treated him like S… so I guess he thinks it’s ok to treat me like that. Thanks for reading if you got this far. I needed that off my chest. I really could use a shoulder to cry on, but I don’t have one 😢
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Introducing myself
Depression Support / by BeautifulAndBroken2022
Last post
 June 30th, 2022
...See more Hi everyone. I’m here to introduce myself. I am Beautiful and Broken. I am not comfortable using my real name, so this is my user name on here. I’ve been through a lot of things in the last 4, almost 5 years and it has put me into a funk. I’m honestly not even sure how I am handling all of what has been thrown at me. From my own observations, it’s more than a person normally goes through in a longer period of time. I feel so lost and down. I don’t feel like doing much of anything any more. I came here so I can let out how I’m feeling. I’ve been on and off this app for the past 4 to 5 years while going through all of this. I actually left it for a long, long time because a listener made me feel even more down in the dumps than I already did and I couldn’t take it. I’m back and hoping this time will be different and that there are actually some compassionate people on here. Thank you for reading. B & B
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I feel really depressed & I’m not sure what to do
Depression Support / by BeautifulAndBroken2022
Last post
 July 2nd, 2022
...See more I have had a rough life the last 4 years. One thing after another kept happening. To start off, I lost my cat. She had a tumor that was cancerous and they couldn’t save her 😭 I miss her so much. Then my spouses sister came into our lives. He hadn’t seen her in years. She is a devious pile of 💩. She caused major problems in our life and marriage. My husband almost divorced me because of things she did and tried to pull. Shortly after this, I found out I was pregnant. I was thrilled but worried. I made a doctors appointment and a few month’s later, I went. Just to find out that the baby stopped growing and was not the size it should have been for how far along I was. I ended up having a miscarriage 😭 I waited for 12 years to finally get pregnant again. This devastated me. About a month or so passed and my husband and I were talking. And for some odd reason, I decided to ask him if he cheated on me again because my gut was telling me he did. He cheated on me once before we got married with one of his ex girlfriends. He asked me where this came from and I told him I have had this feeling for awhile and I needed to know. He came out and told me he had indeed cheated again. Not just once, but twice making it a total of 3 times. Those 2 other times, they were also with 2 more ex girlfriend’s of his. They both initiated it fully knowing who I was and that we are married. Those last 2 times it happened, we were already married. This killed me inside and it still does. My heart shatters every time I think about it. And I try not to, but it pops back in my mind. I stayed with him (we have a child together) and I’m still hurt by what he did to me. I can’t figure out why he did it. And of course I feel like it was my fault. Then I ended up losing my dad. He passed away without me ever getting to say goodbye. It was an unexpected death. This has taken a huge toll on me. I miss him. It’s hard to believe I will never see him again. All in between these 4 years, not only did I lose my dad, but I also lost about 20 more people in my life to death. They were friends and family members. Then last year, I lost my dog. She got really sick and the vet couldn’t get her well. 😢 Lately, my husband has been treating me like garbage. His demeanor towards me has changed. He has not been the nicest person to me. I’m not sure what his problem is, but I don’t know how much more I can take. I’ve been to hell and back in the last 4 years. It has taken the worst kind of toll on me. I’m not happy. I’m broken. Thank you for taking the time to read this….that’s if anyone does ☹️
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