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AverageIdea5798
35,215 M Determined Treads 6
PathStep 78 Compassion hearts199 Forum posts17 Forum upvotes29 Current upvotes29 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2021 Member sinceApril 2, 2019
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this liminal space between despair & hope
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Is there a way to automatically not get connected to a certain segment of 7Cups listener?
Safety & Knowledge at 7 Cups / by AverageIdea5798
Last post
 September 26th, 2019
...See more I was sexually assaulted recently and I currently work in a stressful all-male work environment in a generally gaycist and patriarchal rednecked culture. I love my job and do my best - I try to just be polite around these men and use humour to circumnavigate the sometimes not-so-microaggressions. Things are getting better but sometimes I need to vent 'anonymously' here - and connecting with certain subset of individuals, especially cis/hetero males who are blindly religious and patronizing towards women often results in my retraumatization. Also, I keep getting connected to men from strict religious cultures who will use 7cups as a dating site and they often do not follow what is being taught in their listener training. They would ask for a/s/l and ask if I'm on certain social media sites. I would block them but this means I have wasted another 15 minutes here instead of just connecting to a normal listener instead of a clickfarm troll. 9 out of 10 listeners that I connect with here are either gaycist, sexist, or condescending when they come from these traditional religious cultures. However, an older female listener from more progressive nations will be great, 9 out of 10 times, unless they are a fake listeners (sometimes you can quickly know from their sexy avatars wearing racy outfits). As I am both physically and emotionally sick now, I am very poor and cannot afford therapy here. I do use the guides and other self-help resources but I do appreciate it when I get to connect to any normal listener who speaks English (I am Asian myself, but I speak English - I get listeners here who would spam me in their own mother tongue when I have never once indicated that I am able to converse in that language). It is traumatizing when I keep getting connected with pedo guys here. Their disrespectful and condescending advice (yes they are trolls - they don't listen, they just tell you that you're wrong or right for doing this or that) only makes me want to avoid people who are like them since people who are like them will act the same way 99% of the time. This means I will only get 1 average/normal listener for every 100 that I connect with from these gender/country/ combination, especially if they have a certain kind of avatar (mostly images that would into apps like Tinder, maybe Grindr.) As such, please, please, please let me connect only to females or NON cis/hetero males from progressive cultures here. OR at least - the ability to indicate that I don't want to get connected to those who are anti-LGBT or have sick and non-progressive religious and moral standpoints. This would also mean that the experience would be a better one for everyone - they don't want to be connected to a gay, non-conforming individual and I don't want to be connected to gaycist, religious men who ask me for my mobile number - even if they are so called interns here with a medical license. Said person was from Egypt and seemed very genuine - until he cyberflashed me and then started stalking me here on 7cups using many different usernames. As such, please allow for those suffering from PTSD and complex trauma from being retraumatized. 7Cups used to be a safe place. I hope it will be one again. Cheers. Tl;Dr : I was recently sexually assaulted physically and the way the curse of revictimisation goes, I am also being stalked by a 7Cups male listener who generally hates gay people. Please let me talk only to female listeners from progressive nations. If they are not bots or sock puppets, they are usually great listeners who follow the 7cups guidelines closely. Thanks!
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